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mlplovelight · 2 years ago

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Ch. 4 - Curiosity

What are you thinking about, APPLEJACK?

You’re sitting around the campfire with your friends Sweetcream Scoops and Berryshine, sizing up the strange necromancer pony Twilight Sparkle and her spectral companion Emerald Ray, who have randomly wandered into your life.

There are a lot of things that are racing across your mind, so what do you want to say to them?

“So why were y’all two followin’ us anyhow?” you decide to cut to the chase and ask the important question once everypony is finished with their meal, which takes some time after Twilight Sparkle asks for seconds and then thirds.

“Truth be told,” Emerald Ray is the first to speak up, the green spectral pony speaking with an air of gravitas and grace that makes her hard not to pay attention to, “we weren’t following you. At least, not at first. We were simply headed in the same direction.

“But little miss Twilight has been curious about you for quite some time, Applejack.”

“C’mon, Emerald,” Twilight grumbles, “don’t call me that in front of strangers.”

“I apologize,” Emerald Ray chuckles.

“So wait, back up,” Sweetcream Scoops chimes in, giving Twilight and Emerald an icy glare. “What do you mean ‘quite some time’? Exactly how long have you been spying on Applejack?”

“Yeah, I think I’d like to know that too,” you say awkwardly, the hairs on your neck suddenly standing on edge a bit, or however that turn of phrase goes.

“Spying?” Emerald Ray gives a single scornful chuckle.

“We haven’t been SPYING on you, you jerks!” Twilight points an accusatory hoof at Sweetcream, and then at you, switching back and forth between you two, and then a little bit at Berryshine for good measure. “YOU’RE the ones who come into our home and start making off with stuff!”

“You’re talkin’ about the scrapyard?” you ask, startin’ to put the pieces together. “The ruins of Old Equestria behind Ponyville?”

“That is correct,” Emerald Ray nods. “That scrapyard next to your home is the place that WE call home. We have been observing you and the other ponies of that community when you come into our home for our own safety, as anyone would do when a stranger enters their home.”

“I-I’m sorry if I took anything that belongs to anypony,” you mutter bashfully. “I try my best to only take scrap that isn’t attached to the spirits that roam the ruins.”

“And that level of care and attention is exactly what piqued our curiosity,” Emerald Ray says serenely, and you start to relax a little bit. You were worried you were in trouble for a sec there!

“We’ve been to A LOT of ruins,” Twilight adds, her tone rough and jagged, venom dripping from each word. “Most ponies don’t really care about the history of them, or the spirits that call them home. Even the ones who CLAIM to care about history usually just care about taking whatever they can get their hooves on and turning a profit on it. Makes me sick.”

“Yeah, I know what you mean,” you say seriously. “There’s a whole lotta reasons why a pony might become a scrapper, but one thing a lot of ‘em have in common is a sense that the scrap from Old Equestria is first come first serve, and if you CAN take somethin’, you should.

“I ain’t about that. To me, the scrap is a tool to help the ponies in my community, and it wouldn’t be right for me to help my community at the expense of another. A lot of ponies might see ghosts as just a nuisance or as somethin’ scary, but I know that every spirit was a pony once, and they all have their reasons for hangin’ around. It ain’t my place to disturb ‘em.”

Sweetcream and Berryshine remain conspicuously silent. Berryshine doesn’t have much of an opinion on this matter; she’s not exactly a scrap collector herself, she only goes into the ruins together with other collectors to help carry what they collect for a split of the profits.

On the other hoof, Sweetcream couldn’t give a rat’s flank about the spirits that dwell in the ruins. She’s a practical pony who puts her community first and foremost. It’s only because of your influence that she’s become more hesitant to take what belongs to the spirits.

“Does that satisfy your curiosity, Twilight?” Emerald Ray asks, and you can hear a hint of smug satisfaction in her voice.

Twilight takes a long, slow deep breath, letting it out in an equally slow sigh. She doesn’t say anything else, but Emerald Ray appears to take it as confirmation regardless.

“Twilight Sparkle and I are looking for something,” Emerald Ray explains. “But travel is an exhausting process, especially for a pair such as us who have difficulty interacting with others. Not many are as openly accepting of a necromancer and the ghost that possesses her as you and your friends are.”

“So what, you wanna make me like a job offer or somethin’?” you tilt your head, not really sure what Emerald Ray is getting at here.

“Something like that,” Emerald says. “We know from some of the conversations we’ve overheard that you are interested in the history of the Apple ponies. What we are suggesting is a trade offer.”

“You know what happened to the Apples?!” you jump up in excitement, Sweetcream reflexively grabbing your shoulder to try and remind you to temper your expectations.

“No,” Emerald Ray says, and you sit back down in disappointment. “But I do have some knowledge of the Apple ponies, and I believe I can point you in the direction of those who know more.”

“Hmm, well that’s still pretty interesting,” you hum, stroking your chin. “So what would I be givin’ you in return?”

“Don’t misunderstand me, Applejack,” Emerald Ray says. “What I am offering is not a simple exchange of services, but an opportunity for both of us to benefit equally. What I am suggesting is that you, myself, and miss Twilight set out from this place together.

“You will help us with the things that our… *unique circumstances* make difficult for us, such as procuring food and lodging, and we will help you with our knowledge and expertise, and hopefully both of us can find what we’re looking for.”

You tap your chin even more thoughtfully now. That’s quite an offer they’re proposin’, and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t at least a little curious, but uprootin’ your whole life on a whim like that is—

“Hold on a sec,” Sweetcream interjects, standing defensively between you and Emerald Ray. “How exactly do we know we can trust you? How do we know you even have any info on the Apple ponies, or that you have any of this ‘expertise’ you claim? All we’ve seen from your necromancer is aggression and embarrassingly poor stealth!”

“Do you want to see what I can do that badly?” Twilight says coldly, staring dead-eyed straight at Sweetcream Scoops, and for the first time you feel yourself actually scared of her.

“Relax, Twilight,” Emerald steps between Twilight and Sweetcream to stand directly in front of your friend. “These ponies are absolutely justified in their suspicion. In fact, I would be concerned if they DIDN’T express some measure of skepticism.”

“Okay, so… where are my answers?” Sweetcream doesn’t back down, just pushing back against Emerald Ray.

“Yeah! Get their butts, Sweetcream!” Berryshine cheers.

“Uh, hold on,” you clear your throat and step in front of Sweetcream, gently pushing her back again. It’s your instinct to step in when stuff starts to get heated, and the last thing you wanna see is a fight breakin’ out or somethin’. “Can I have some time to think things over?”

“Of course,” Emerald Ray says. “We’re practically neighbors once we return home, so you’ll have plenty of time to think things over and you’ll know where to find us once you’ve reached a decision.”

“Then I think I’ll take you up on that at least,” you say, sitting on your haunches. “Cuz this is kinda a lot.”

“I understand,” Emerald Rays hums. “If I may ask though, what do you already know about the Apple ponies?”

“Not much,” you shrug. “Just that they were at the forefront of a lot of Old Equestrian technology, they made a bunch of the stuff that we’ve been able to recover and repurpose to make our lives easier even in modern Equestria.”

“Are you aware that they were all clearkin ponies?” Emerald Ray asks, and your ears flick up.

“No, that’s news to me,” you say in awe, mouth thoroughly agape. The clearkin ponies are a nomadic and ascetic culture of earth ponies; they often live in the mountains, far away from the more coastal regions the hearthkin ponies that you belong to live in.

“Wh—is that true?” Sweetcream asks, sounding just as awed as you are. “They weren’t hearthkin ponies? I thought—“

“Not only were they clearkin,” Emerald Ray explains, “but it’s said that the first Apple was the originator of clearkin magic. I don’t know if that part of the story is true, but I find it believable, and I know that the Apples were a respected clan in clearkin culture. They might still be, but it’s been an age since I last spoke with clearkin ponies.”

This suddenly went from being ‘a lot’ to being A LOT.

“Uhhhhh,” is all you know how to say.

“Yeah, are you impressed?” Twilight says smugly. “Emerald Ray knows what’s up! She wasn’t lying about our expertise!”

“The word ‘our’ is doing some heavy lifting there, pup,” Sweetcream says coldly, and Twilight just clicks her tongue in response.

“Listen here you little—“ Twilight stomps her hoof and takes a step forward before Emerald chimes in.

“Don’t lose your head, Twilight,” she says.

“But Emerald! I can’t just let them talk about me like that!” Twilight huffs.

“Who are you trying to impress?” Emerald asks, and Twilight just groans and takes a step back, Sweetcream adorning a smug grin in the process.

“Cool your heels too, Sweetcream,” you stand up and put a hoof on Sweetcream’s shoulder. “First impressions aside, these two have been nothin’ but nice to us.”

“Fine, whatever,” Sweetcream rolls her eyes and walks away toward her tent. “You do whatever you want, Applejack. I’m hitting the hay.”

“I think I’ll turn in too,” Berryshine yawns. “Will you be okay by yourself, Applejack?”

“Mhm,” you nod confidently.

“Heh, I knew you’d say that,” Berryshine chuckles and then takes off for her tent, leaving you alone with Twilight and Emerald Ray, which honestly suits you just fine. Less moods you gotta juggle, less ponies you gotta look out for.

“Finally,” Twilight exhales sharply. “Maybe now we can have a decent conversation.”

“I apologize for my friends,” you say quietly, taking a couple steps away from the tents and toward the edge of your camp. “I swear they’re both sweethearts.”

“I don’t doubt it,” Emerald Ray offers a pleasant smile. “Like I said, Twilight and I are used to meeting friction on account of our eccentricities.”

“Used to it, yeah,” Twilight grumbles, folding her forelegs across her chest and sitting on her haunches. “It still sucks though.”

“I know,” Emerald Ray offers a sympathetic sigh and curls her spectral form up around Twilight like a blanket.

You can’t help but sympathize with these two, especially considering the tenderness on display in their relationship. They’re kind to each other, and they’ve been kind to you.

You remember what it was like when you were all alone, just you against the world. No family, no friends, and a debilitating unchecked emotional disorder that you didn’t know how to deal with. It sucked, and no one was there for you, so you always do your best to be there for others.

You’ve made up your mind already. You’re gonna take them up on their offer, not outta curiosity about the Apples (though that is a neat perk) but because two ponies who need help are asking for it right in front of you, and you can’t turn them down.

“What exactly are y’all two lookin’ for anyway?” you ask, figuring you should know what you’re getting into before you sign up.

“My body,” Emerald Ray says. “If I can find the corporeal shell I used to inhabit in life, I can be revived and continue my life anew.”

“Is that how that works?” you tilt your head in confusion. “I didn’t think there was any way for a pony to be brought back after they die.”

“Most ponies don’t possess the mastery of life and death that I have,” Emerald Ray says, and her absolute confidence sends a chill up your spine. “After all, most ponies are not ancient alicorn sorcerers.”

“EXCUSE me?” you balk, unable to contain a befuddled scoff. “Now I know yer just pullin’ my leg. Even IF alicorns really existed, and that’s a BIG ‘if’, they all would’ve disappeared hundreds or even thousands of years ago!”

“Oh, I didn’t realize there was an expiration date on being dead,” Emerald Ray says dryly.

“Har har,” you narrow your eyes. “What I’m sayin’ is, even if you were supposedly an alicorn, how could you expect your body to still be around? It would’ve rotted away eons ago!”

“Twilight, do you want to show her the thing?” Emerald Ray asks, and the sheer casualness of her voice gives you pause.

“Oh, yeah sure,” Twilight nods and she takes off her saddlebags, dropping them on the ground and opening up one side, revealing a pouch full to bursting with bony bones.

“Uhhhhhh,” again, you’re not sure what to say, but then you realize what actually matters.

The bones are radiating with magic, in a way not too different from the scrap of Old Equestria.

“Beautiful aren’t they?” Emerald Ray chuckles. “These are all my bones.”

The collection is mostly indistinct shards and maybe some cracked ribs or somethin’; even with the sheer number in front of you, you can’t make out any shapes that would actually constitute a full skeleton or anything even close.

“Uhhhhhh,” you got nothin’.

But you can’t deny that these are pony bones, and you can’t deny the magic pourin’ off of ‘em. You’re not sure you’re convinced that these are necessarily alicorn bones, or even that they’re Emerald Ray’s bones, but SOMETHING is definitely up with ‘em.

“Well alright then,” you take a deep breath and then smile at Twilight Sparkle and Emerald Ray. “I dunno what to really make of this sudden swerve, but I do know this; you two are askin’ for my help, and I’m happy to give it. If y’all wanna travel together in search of your body, count me in.”

“Uhhhhhhh,” Twilight blurts out, jaw dropped. Both her and Emerald Ray’s eyes are wide with shock, and you suddenly notice that Emerald Ray’s eyes are a striking sapphire blue.

“Well!” Emerald Ray chirps. “Consider me pleasantly surprised.”

“What, you didn’t think I’d really do it?” you say with a laugh.

“We’re not used to things going our way, that’s all,” Emerald Ray says.

“Tell ya what,” you say, “we’ll head back to Ponyville together. It’s not too far, but it’ll give us a little taste of travellin’ together. Once we’re back home, we’ll make some preparations. I’ve gone on a couple trips before, but nothin’ too big. Do you know where we’re headed, by the way?”

“I have some ideas, but nothing concrete, I’m afraid,” Emerald Ray says.

“That’s what I figured,” you nod. “So we should prepare for a big trip, just in case. Oh, and if we’re goin’ on a big trip, it might not be too easy with just the three of us, so I’ll ask around town and see if anyone else wants to come with.”

“By all means, invite whoever you feel is up to the task,” Emerald Ray says, her voice as pleasant as her smile.

“Geez, I’m gettin’ kinda excited now!” you can’t help but stamp your hooves in the dirt to get the energy out. “I’ve always wanted to go on like an adventure!”

“Me too,” Twilight mutters under her breath, a slight smirk cracking through her defenses. You decide not to call attention to it cuz you’re pretty sure she’d just get embarrassed, but she’s kinda adorable.

#lovelight #mlp #g4 #fim #fanfic #story posting #applejack #twilight sparkle #emerald ray #sweetcream scoops #berryshine

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thegreenwolf · 4 years ago

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Betting on the Ponies (originally posted at my blog at https://thegreenwolf.com/betting-on-the-ponies/)

(Above: Breyer Classic Arabian Stallion made over into a winged unicorn with real wings from a barnyard mix rooster I raised for meat.)

If you’ve been paying attention to my social media or my shop links at all, you may have noticed that I haven’t really been posting much in the way of new hide and bone art for the past year or so. It’s not that I’ve stopped; I still make some fun things for my Patrons on Patreon every month, and I make some bone, tooth and claw jewelry on Etsy to order. But ever since events dried up, I haven’t been regularly making new batches of costume pieces or other Vulture Culture art. My usual M.O. was to make all sorts of new things for an upcoming event, and then once the weekend was done and I was home, post whatever hadn’t sold on Etsy. And since there haven’t been events…well…I’ve just found myself doing other things.

Some of that is because I’ve had to scramble to make up for the lost income; events were a pretty big chunk of my “pay”, and losing them meant having to tighten the belt. I also lost several other income streams thanks to the pandemic making it unsafe to be around groups of people, which didn’t help. So I had to rely on what was left, along with adopting a few new sources of bits and bobs of cash here and there.

And, honestly, I’ve needed a bit of a break. I’ve been making hide and bone art for over two decades now, and while I love it, any artist eventually wants to explore different media for a while. Sure, I’ve stretched my Vulture wings in new directions, going from costume pieces and ritual tools to assemblages and the Tarot of Bones. But ever since the Tarot came out, I’ve been feeling….not really burned out, but a little creatively wrung out, at least. I’ve really appreciated my Patrons and Etsy customers who have helped me keep a hand in that particular medium, while also allowing me to head off in other directions, too.

Which is to say that if you have been paying attention to the aforementioned social media and shops, you may have also noticed that I’ve been increasing the number of customized Breyer model horses and other animals I’ve made over the past couple of years. This might seem like a heck of a departure from skulls, bones, and other dead things. But in a way it’s really me getting back to long-neglected roots.

(One of my favorite customs I’ve done on one of my favorite molds, the Breyer semi-rearing mustang. )

See, I was a horse girl when I was a kid. Or, rather, I was a wannabe horse girl. I never got to lease or own a horse, and even now in my early 40s I’m still about the greenest rider you’ll find. (Seriously, I need one of those kid-proof horses that’s seen it all, done it all, and is probably more trail-smart than I am.) But I was obsessed with horses from a young age. It started with my very first My Little Pony that I got Christmas morning, 1983 (Applejack, if you must know), and then exploded further with a book on how to draw horses and my first Breyer model (Black Beauty 1991 on the Morganglanz mold) in my preteens. Horse actually took over for Gray Wolf for a few years as my primary animal spirit during my teens, so we have a very long history indeed.

And since I couldn’t have a real horse, I ended up collecting model horses, mostly Breyers with a few old Hartlands for variety. I had over 100 at the peak of my collecting, but I had to sell them all in my early twenties when I was between jobs. In hindsight it was probably for the best because having less stuff made it easier to get through the period of my life where I was moving about once a year, but I do miss that collection.

Back then I did my part to add to the artistic end of the model horse hobby, mostly with badly blended acrylic paint jobs and terrifying mohair manes and tails. But it made me happy, and that was the most important thing. Even though I only knew a couple other collectors in my little rural area, and my only real connection to the hobby was through the quarterly Just About Horses magazine Breyer put out, my collecting really made me happy in the same way that my first fur scraps and bones would catch my interest a few years later.

2020….well, it sucked. We all know that. Pandemic, political stress, financial roller coasters and more made it a really tough year for anyone who wasn’t wealthy enough to hide away and weather it all. And many of us found ourselves with more time at home, in need of distractions and solace. It ended up being a time where many people rediscovered their love of childhood hobbies. I’m one of those people. I’ve been slowly edging my way back in for the past few years, starting with repainting a few old Breyer models found at thrift stores, and then gaining momentum as I found that not only was I much better at customizing these models than I used to be, but I was having fun without the pressure to make a living off of it. (Yes, I love my hide and bone art, but when an art form is your bread and butter, it changes your relationship to it. But that’s a post for another time…)

So 2020 saw me really ramp up my customization efforts. I had to stop for a few months in summer and fall when I moved to a spifftacular new living space on the farm I’ve been working on the past few years (with, by the way, THE best studio space EVER!) but as the days shortened I found myself making more dedicated time to repainting and otherwise customizing models. I even started keeping a few of the models I’d bought to customize that were in better condition to create a small, but slowly growing original finish collection, and that really helped me feel like I was back in the (not actually a) saddle.*

That’s why a well-established artist of organic, pagan-influenced arts made from fur and leather and bone and feather suddenly started painting all these secondhand plastic ponies. It’s giving me that deep injection of childhood nostalgia balanced with adult skill and perspective, and it’s offered me a much-needed break from the exhausting schedule I’ve been living the past decade or so. Because suddenly, even with the time spent rearranging my income opportunities to make sure I could stay afloat, I found myself with a little time that hadn’t been scheduled to death, and when I thought about what I wanted to do with that time, I gravitated toward one of the few creative outlets in my life that was purely for fun.**

(Yes, this IS fan art of “The Last Unicorn”! I used a Breyer Stablemate rearing Arabian for the unicorn, and a Breyer Spanish fighting bull for the Red Bull. A LOT of fun to make this particular project.)

In a way having all my events canceled was one of the best things that happened to me, because it made me slow the fuck down. I no longer had several weekends a year where I had to spend weeks beforehand making art and otherwise preparing to be away from all my farm responsibilities for 4-7 days at a time, with all the packing and moving and setup and vending and teaching and teardown and going home and unpacking and exhaustion that goes with each event. I realized just how much each one was taking out of me, especially as I’ve gotten older. And I also recognized how much pressure I had been putting on myself to ALWAYS MAKE MORE STUFF FOR ETSY EVERY WEEK OR ELSE.

So the model horses are really sort of a symbol of the childhood joy I’ve managed to recapture, wresting time and energy back from my workaholic tendencies. I’ve even been thinking about what my professional life is going to look like once the pandemic eases up enough to allow events again, and whether I’ll put the same amount of time toward vending and and teaching at conventions and festivals as I used to. (There are a few favorites that I’m not going to miss for anything, so don’t worry about me dropping out entirely.) But for the first time in a very long time, I’m relearning to prioritize myself, and figuring out that maybe I don’t have to go hell-bent for leather every week, every year, in order to keep the bills paid and the critters fed.

And maybe, just maybe, it’s okay for this dead-critter-artist, pagan-nonfic-author, teacher-vendor-farmer, to indulge herself with something fun, and bet on the ponies to help her get through the tough times.

(P.S. Amid everything going on, I am back to working steadily on my next book, which I mentioned in this blog post almost a year ago. As a recap, its working title is Coyote’s Journey: Deeper Work With the Major Arcana, and it’s a deep dive into that section of the tarot using pathworkings with the animals I assigned to the major arcana of the Tarot of Bones. It’s not just a Tarot of Bones book, though; it’s a good way to get a new, nature-based angle on the majors in general, as well as hopefully gain a better understanding of yourself. My goal is to have it out later this year, self-pub of course, and at the rate I’m going it may end up being my longest book! Stay tuned, and if you want to get excerpts of the work-in-progress, become my Patron for as little as $1/month!)

*At the height of my “horse girl” phase, I had a really beat-up pony saddle I’d bought for ten bucks at a yard sale, and got a cheap saddle stand for it and put it in my room. And yes, I occasionally sat on it and pretended I was riding an actual horse. Hey, it made me happy at the time, and it was the closest I was ever going to get apart from a trail ride every few years.

**Yes, I do sell my customs. But I don’t make them on a schedule, I take commissions VERY sparingly, and I’m getting to stretch some new creative muscles, especially in the realms of sculpting and painting, so this is primarily for my enjoyment. The sales are just a side benefit.

(My ode to the forests of the Pacific Northwest, a Breyer deer repainted to resemble the Columbian black-tailed deer that frequent the farm I live on, along with hand-sculpted Amanita muscaria mushrooms, real and fake moss, and real lichens from fallen branches.)

#Breyer #model horses #vulture culture #artwork #artist

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xenoredux · 4 years ago

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Tagalong Tex is not Applejack a big brother pony equipped with strength magic. Like other big brother and big sister ponies, he’s unusually large, having descended from a long line of Clydesdale-like miniature horses with a proud history of globetrotting for the sake of finding and helping those in need. He’s an implant into Paradise Estates, having been born and raised in the Wild Whinny West. The major difference between he and his gal pals is that he takes Starwish’s concerns about the witches a smidge more seriously.

The Wild Whinny West (”three dubbya” as he says it) isn’t an easy place to live. Only the toughest of equines thrive in that gritty desert among the predatory animals like bobcattle and ratty-snakes. Because of this, Tex has spent most of his life collecting calluses and building muscle. He’s become a hypermasc survivalist, his immense strength and boundless bravery only being boosted by his gift. His mom, dad, 15 brothers, and 4 sisters are all very proud of him.

Tex has never been afraid of facing tangible foes given he has unchippable hooves, near endless stamina, and an earth shattering kick. That’s why he’s at the estates: his personal mission as a Big Brother is to protect the villagers from the evil, if incompetent, Gloom Witches. But there is one thing he’s afraid of, and that’s letting ponies know his secret. See, Tex has a pretty big feminine side. He loves pink things, baby animals, and dotting his I’s with hearts. He hides Your Tiny Lady dolls under his mattress and knows every song from the jukebox musical Mare-a Mia by heart. He hates that he’s not the perfectly manly brohorse everyone thinks he is. His magical gift is STRENGTH, for crying out loud, he shouldn’t cry when he walks past baby clothes in the market!

Of course this is all nonsense. In time Tex’s friends show him that there’s not only nothing wrong with his gender nonconformity, but his magic isn’t contradictory to his behavior. For one, liking “chick stuff” isn’t weak. And for two, the emotional sensitivity he attempts to hide isn’t weak either. He’s always the first to offer his buds a shoulder to cry on, or even just a non-judgmental ear. His strength doesn’t just account for his beefy haunches, but also his patience and empathy. It just takes some unconditional support to show him this.

Tex’s determination to look like one of The Good Ol’ Boys is very apparent in his (openly displayed) home decor as well as the hobbies he (publicly) participates in, all of it coming with some influence from his natal culture. His stable walls are littered with western film posters, newspaper clippings of memorable cowcolt exploits, the gears of old farm equipment, and literally anything that you can attach a spur or some paisley to. Hell, past his collection of old heavy lifting medals and trophies you can find a taxidermized jackalope with a novelty ten gallon hat.

But his most prized possession is tucked deeply but safely in the crevice between his headboard and mattress: Cuddleclaws the Bear. Tagalong has had Cuddleclaws since before he can remember, and no matter what happens to the little guy, he never lets him go. If the teddy gets torn, he uses scrap fabric to patch him up. If Tex is stuck on a problem, he speaks aloud to the toy until he yammers his way into a solution. And if ever he’s stressed - a common occurrence when saving the day is your day job - he gives his little pardner a big ol’ bear hug.

#my little pony #hasbro #mlp #applejack #pony #horse #equine #tagalong tex #pony designs #pony words #character design #character redesign #prop design #concept art #visual development #fanart

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glapplebloom · 3 years ago

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How do you study?

Tomorrow is the big Test for Rainbow Dash to be a part of the reserves. Twilight is freaking out as always, and she’s not even taking it. Rainbow Dash seems calm but Twilight decides to try to help Rainbow Dash study. Two things to point out. First:

Rainbow Dash: Twilight, not everypony gets all freaked out about tests like you.

Twilight Sparkle: I do not get "all freaked out" about tests!

Rainbow Dash: Uh, seriously? Your freakouts are so epic, you sing whole freakout arias about freaking out.

Second: since this episode, there’s another show that put emphasis on intellectual knowledge beyond your natural talent. Dragon Ball Super has a Inter-Dimensional Tournament where the only way to participate is to pass a written exam. Goku barely passed while Buu failed. Granted, knowing the history of a business isn’t necessary to be part of it, but it helps to fuel your passion towards that job.

Twilight tried her various methods of studying, but Rainbow Dash wasn’t really getting into it. I think its because she wasn’t seeing how much of a big deal this test was at the time. More on this later. But after failing a pop quiz from Twilight, Rainbow Dash now realizes the situation she is in: if she fails this test she will not become a Wonderbolt.

After a short argument that was stopped by Fluttershy, the shy one shares her studying style with Dash: watching a visual history lesson. Now how does Fluttershy know more about the Wonderbolts than Rainbow Dash? Well, notice who is actually directing it. This maybe Fluttershy’s style but its Spike’s play. This does not work since Rainbow Dash can not interpret the Animals.

Pinkie Pie’s turn and she tries to teach through song. I think the only problem is she’s using rap when Rainbow Dash is clearly a rock fan. So how does Pinkie Pie know the history? She is the Super Party Pony of Ponyville and others are fans of the Wonderbolts. And we’ve seen how thorough she can get.

Rarity’s is roleplaying. Granted, her knowledge of the Wonderbolts is pretty much only about the fashion sides of things but its kind of nice knowing Rarity’s obsession with acting in Pony Life came from. Meanwhile Applejack’s method is just years of knowledge gained through passion.

Now why does Rainbow Dash, someone who wants to be a Wonderbolt, don’t have the same passion as Applejack does with Apples? Its because Rainbow Dash is a fan of the Modern Wonderbolts. Like in wrestling terms, you can be a fan of Roman Reigns or Kenny Omega yet have no clue who Bruno Sammartino or Bob Backlund are.

All this failure to learn through their methods make Rainbow Dash sad. When Twilight tried to cheer her up, she discovers Rainbow Dash has the agility to do multiple things while flying. Granted, her ego or frustration has lead her to crash a couple of times but this does show how good of a flier she is. And it gives Twilight a plan...

Get all of Ponyville to help Rainbow Dash Study. Ironically, this is technically like the flash card technique just on a larger scale. I’m pretty sure if you scale it back while she’s doing activities she can retain it. But this is also why Ponyville is such a safe place to be outside the numerous attacks. Everyone knows everyone. And if one goes rouge, they can always do what Townsville did during Collect Her.

Thanks to the Flash Mob Flash Cards, Rainbow Dash aces her test and is a few seasons away from being a full fledge Wonderbolt. Overall it is a fun episode showing all sorts of studying methods while showing how close Ponyville citizens are with each other. As for the changes, they are the same as last time.

#mlp review #MLP Revisit #Green Lantern Apple Bloom #Season 4

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takaraphoenix · 5 years ago

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...You know what, with the most recent episodes, it really becomes apparent why this needs to be the final season.

Because “2, 4, 6, Greaaat” teaching Rainbow Dash, of all ponies, in the 9th season, that she doesn’t have to care about something but about the creatures who care about it - Rainbow Dash, aka the jock who only cares about her sports and the Wonderbolts, whose best friends are a fashionista, an animal enthusiast, a book-worm, a hard-working farmer and a party pony. Rainbow Dash literally has been learning this lesson within the first season. To pretend that this was a huge reveal now, with a bunch of secondary characters she ain’t even close with, was... kind of cringey to watch because it’s a huge set-back for Rainbow’s character development.

And to pretend in “The Summer Sun Setback” that Twilight Sparkle is absolutely composed, not relying on lists and not freaking out after literally in the episode before that we see her with an insane list, hyperventilating, acting unnecessarily vicious toward a friend because she is freaking out in “A Trivial Pursuit” is also ridiculous. “A Trivial Pursuit” was a giant character set-back, particularly considering that the calm and collected Twilight we see in “The Summer Sun Setback” is exactly the Twilight this entire show has been working toward, what exactly is the point of giving us basically a season 1 Twilight just one episode prior...?

And it was such a massive one at that. Seriously, Twilight deliberately sabotaging Pinkie Pie just so she can win the game was incredibly out of line considering the last nine seasons of character development for Twilight.

At this point, the friendship lessons for the mane six are just so forced and shoe-horned in and basically reset the characters to season 1 level every time so they can learn a lesson they should have already learned. I kind of thought that was the point of Twilight opening a school for friendship; so those super basic lessons that the mane six learned years ago can now be taught on the example of the new characters.

I’d have much rather seen, I don’t know, Smolder being super competitive about a game in the school and pushing Yona aside to then learn to play in a team than have Twilight, who is supposedly now the Princess of Friendship and is literal weeks from taking over as the ruler of Equestria, deliberately getting her partner disqualified from a dumb game of trivial pursuit just so she can win.

Especially considering that “She Talks to Angel” was a really good Fluttershy-centric episode that brought something new to the table and finally shone a light to something that I greatly disliked (namely, Angel’s behavior toward Fluttershy).

While “The Last Laugh” was a great Pinkie Pie-centric episode that brought something up that I hadn’t even thought about so far; that Pinkie is the only one who hasn’t quite moved forward in life.

Mixed feelings on the Rarity-centric episode because on the one hand, it wasn’t as over the top as Rainbow and Twilight’s episodes, on the other the principle of “You gotta share your friends with other friends” seems like a super “well duh” lesson for someone part of the literal Mane Six where six ponies have equally close friendships and share that bond with each other.

And I suppose we’re counting “Going to Seed” as the final Applejack-centric episode. I... liked that one, yeah, though I’d have expected it to be later, like the other Mane Six individual episodes.

Anyway, the point of this is: I know I complained about too much distraction from the new characters I don’t care about in the last season, but if we’re just rehashing basic lessons, I’d much rather see those on new characters who haven’t learned them than to totally set back the Mane Six after 9 seasons of character development.

#My Little Pony #Friendship is Magic

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tricks-up-my-sleeve · 6 years ago

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((okay so spoilers for s8 ep 18 aka on the road to friendship under the cut w/ a bunch of spoiler tags just in case))

So uhhh this episode was everything I wanted? A lot of it’s subtle things, but, I’m ghkjlhgfd I’m not crying you are. I don’t do horse analysis or reviews or anything like that I grew tired of those types of things ages ago bc it personally gets to a point where it sucks out the fun for me but I’m just gonna make bullet points of all of my thoughts. Mainly involving Trixie and how this episode ties into my portrayal of her. Probably others too, though.

The little magic show at the beginning? Wonderful. I love these two performing together.. and together in general. Twi & Caddy even agree on how they’re such a good duo.

Speaking of which, Twi complimenting Trixie with a huge smile? HERE. FOR. IT.

Flurry Heart watching the show was adorable. Also the inclusion of Granny Smith was of course great.

“Doing a show with you is almost as much fun as counseling students at Twilight’s school.” Almost? I’m disappointed. It’s not the first time I’ll be disappointed in Glim this episode, but we’ll get there. She’s still loved.. but it gets rough.

Loved how Hoo’far called Trixie “Miss Powerful” and her reaction to it. Just cute and silly.

TRIXIE’S. LOVE. FOR. HER. WAGON. I didn’t expect this to be a big plot point in the ep or really ever brought up, but I was so thrilled because that’s always been a small part of my Trixie. She loves her wagon. It may be small and cramped (and also, it apparently has a pretty fucked up doorknob) but it has sentimental value. It means a lot to her. I loved this so much. Not once did she stop and consider trading it for something that a lot would look at and assume was superior.

Moonwalking Trixie.

Trixie bringing up how traveling gets pretty lonely a few times in this ep. Pretty much something that’s easy to guess or assume, but that’s also something my Trixie hasn’t been too shy of admitting, either.

Trixie!!! Levitating!!! Herself!!! She obviously learned that from Starlight. Although we didn’t see it much, I’m so fucking thrilled that we see that Trixie’s been improving her magic. An issue I had with To Change A Changeling (which is just a nitpick) is that they really don’t bring that up. Personally, ever since All Bottled Up, I’ve definitely been convinced that Trixie actually has strong potential for magic, given the right teacher. Glim Glam succeeds there. I could go more into detail to why I think this is but I’ll spare you.

Trixie on the couch in Starlight’s office. I don’t even have to say anything. Just perfect.

I love how Trixie painstakingly made room for the both of them in the wagon. To it’s credit, looking at it paused, it at least isn’t as small on the inside as it is the outside. It has an entire cannon in there. It seemed like she set up two beds for them? Perhaps at least one of them was makeshift? It’s hard to tell, since Star brought stuff and then she set up hammocks. It did look slightly cozier in there before the extra luggage, though. What I guess I’m getting at, is that although it’s a tight squeeze, it’s good to see that it can at least fit two ponies, although it’s not entirely ideal.

Seeing the inside of the wagon’s been a thing I’ve wanted for ages. I could sit and look at every little thing in there and just smile for a while. Super cute.

Trixie really is sweet and considerate, you know. Seriously. Asking if Starlight is sure she doesn’t want to ride instead of walking with her, and giving her more than one chance to back out on the trip if she wants to.

THE SONG. Tell me I’m biased, I don’t care. This is my favorite horse song. I’ve waited patiently for pony Trix to sing... and it’s just.. all so fucking cute. Too much to take in.

More of Trixie’s magic shown in her shielding Starlight. Love it.

“For untold seasons yet to come, our friendship will be here!” “For nine, at least.” FUCKING. WOW. That’s clever but it also hurt my heart. Especially since my favorite friendship duo has only known each other for three of those seasons thus far, and ultimately it’ll only be four. Too soon, Glimmy.

Trixie talking about how she learned the hard way about life on the road and saving bits and all that. I like that. It shows her more mature side, and that she’s a little street smart from experience. Usually she’s kinda shown as less mature than Starlight, and this episode shows the flip side, which I really like.

I love how she’s adamant on buying hay cakes (Haycakes? They’ve used the word pancake before, though. What’s the difference?) from her preferred stand. Like.. me too, Trix. Clearly there’s a higher quality in the line that’s actually got ponies in it.

This is where Trixie and Starlight really start to argue like a married couple. Here I thought Applejack and Rainbow Dash took the prize for that. This is so domestic tho.

The first argument, at least, is short lived. I really liked that. Trixie sighs, presumably not wanting to push farther to where she hurts Starlight’s feelings. Love how she says “No, of course not.” and continues to apologize for getting snippy. She’s really improved on being.. to put it lightly, less bitchy. It’s what I love about watching her, and while To Change A Changeling was hilarious, that was my other nitpick. She had an attitude almost the entire time.. but it was funny, and I wouldn’t go as far as to call it OOC, so I wasn’t mad. The reason Trixie appeals to me so much is that she’s definitely a much nicer pony, but she’s still her. She hasn’t seemingly changed overnight from the first time we saw her, but she’s definitely made an effort. She’s quite the sweetheart when she wants to be.

I love how Trixie states that it’s taken her years to collect all of her magical items. I just think it’s neat. Also, rightfully getting offended when her stuff is called junk.

Coward Trixie returns. This is definitely me looking too deep into it but personally I’d like to think that yeah, after the Ursa event, I’d be scared of animals outside, too.

Starlight snoring and Trixie outright performing in her sleep. Lmfao. I’ve said this like fifteen times already about other things but I love it.

I relate to these tired and grumpy girls, but even I would have made sure to save some food / juice for my pal. Well.. maybe the juice was definitely out of spite. Wish I could scold her, but I would’ve done the same thing.

The grouchy magic show hurt me to watch. It was still funny though. Again, definitely arguing like a married couple. Two tired, angry friends trying to work together is just never gonna turn out right.

I love their voices in the “Practice makes perfect.” “Not today it didn’t.” exchange. So sassy. So higher pitched. Those faces, too. Lol.

Starlight throwing all of Trixie’s shit out followed by Trix yelling “You can HAVE IT ALL!” Oof. Almost like I’m watching a breakup right before my very eyes. Also the way she runs off. These poor hopeless gays.

STARLIGHT GLIMMER CONFIRMED WORST GIRLFRIEND. I’mjustkidding. Naturally I saw this coming from a mile away, but still. Wow. Ouch. I do like though how it seems to be consistent that she can be defensive of her bad decisions. Not really realizing that what she’s doing is wrong.

TRIXIE FREAKING OUT, THEN BEING BROUGHT TO TEARS BECAUSE STARLIGHT TRADED HER WAGON. This hurt me more than you could imagine, but what hurt me even more is that Starlight didn’t even flinch, and was completely insensitive about it for a while. Yikes. I already went into how much I love Trixie’s attachment to her wagon, but this killed me.

Also, pretty sure that selling or trading somebody else’s stuff is illegal, Star. Trixie shouldn’t have beef with Hoo’far. She should just be planning a lawsuit against Glimmer instead.

Am I just crazy or stupid? When Trixie tells Starlight that at least the wagon wouldn’t have traded her away, I was like, yEAH, you’re valid. Tell her. It made total sense to me. Then Starlight just responds with “That’s ridiculous.” Like?? It wasn’t to me? I sound silly now bc I get the joke, it’s an inanimate object, but what I’m trying to get at is that Trixie was pretty much trying to say that if Starlight really was her best friend she wouldn’t have done that.

I love how Trixie doesn’t accept the flattery from Hoo’far like she normally would bc she’s real pissed. To be fair, though, it’s really not his fault. I mean.. okay, a little, considering he should have known that it didn’t belong to Starlight, and that the trade needed to be given the okay by Trixie. He’s not a bad guy, though.

TRIXIE LYING IN FRONT OF THE CART FOR HOURS BC NO WAY IN HELL IS SHE LETTING THIS GUY TAKE IT. AMAZING. Give it up for his patience, too.

Starlight finds out that you win some and you lose some with the bigger caravan. Also, I love how she didn’t realize how fucked up stuff was when she was with Trixie and having a good time. Her regret sinking in seems about right. You can see her start to miss her.

“Sometimes travelling together is hard.” “But you reminded us that you can also make it fun!” Definite lesson that these two needed. Obviously Starlight was breaking before hearing that, but those big sad eyes she gets after. Regret.

“What are you two doing?” “Taking a stand! By lying down!” Lmao. Never change, Trixie.

“Best friends who share a deep bond but weren’t prepared for the emotional challenges of traveling.” Oh, definitely. Really feel like their first trip should have been a short one. Possibly with more planning ahead of time.

Best. Friendship. Chant.

“Only true friends would be willing to act so ridiculous for one another.” Aww. True.

“At a certain point, I don’t even like travelling with myself.” Line I really liked. Also Starlight saying that it’s harder than she thought.

Despite their exchange about knowing not to do it again, eh, still not wanting to completely rule out the thought of them travelling together in the future. Like I said, with more precautions taken, pretty sure they could’ve been just fine. Mainly reserving a room at an inn, since the big issue really just seemed to be them getting crabby sleeping in the wagon. Would’ve preferred it if it kinda gave that lesson and had Trixie say that they’ll know how to handle it next time, with both of them saying yeah, but let’s not make that anytime soon.

Trixie and Starlight almost killed an old man.

That’s it, if anyone even read through all of that. Can’t really say much more. This may or may not be my favorite Trixie episode. I’ll have to give it some time, but I loved almost everything about it. (No Second Prances is my current favorite I suppose, due to it also validating a lot of how I viewed Trixie at the time, and still do.)

Like I said.. it’s just really refreshing to see her take on a more mature stance than Starlight for the most part, since other episodes usually show the exact opposite. Not that Starlight is incredibly mature in her own right, but she does usually take that role when it comes to her dynamic with Trixie. I love any chance we get to see Trixie, but in episodes like To Change A Changeling, sometimes I worry that they don’t give her enough credit. She’s not a complete incompetent bitch, and to be fair, I don’t think she ever really has been. I won’t go into how I personally view her flaws, though. Guess that could be another post.

Until next time. Hopefully there is another next time. Starlight’s line in the song about nine seasons still has me all fucked up and I need help. Maybe one day I could go back and do these for past Trix episodes.

#mlp spoilers #s8 spoilers #mlp s8 spoilers #spoilers #mlp s8 e18 #on the road to friendship #🎆 || out of peanut butter crackers. { ooc }#🎆 || a good magician never reveals her secrets. { musings }#🎆 || unbeknownst to the public. { headcanons }#wasn't sure what to tag this as but i felt at least one of them fit

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idolshineitai · 3 years ago

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for the get to know you im just curious if you have a crush on amy fictional characters? or on anyone in general actually

👉👈 HIII YES I HAVE FICTIONAL CRUSHES im gonna take this as an opportunity to ramble abt them. Thank you

i selfship but i havent done it seriously in a while plus i have problems! my partner is susie deltarune…i LOOOVE her to pieces shes so wonderful 💘🌷 a very pretty monster i wanna kiss.. many thoughts & feelings abt her.. shes made me plushies b4 & she calls me her bunny rabbit & shes gonna hold me For Ever !!

my crushes tho (ideally partners someday but, again, i have problems):

i like kaoru seta bandori a TON!!!!!!! so many thoughts & feelings about her. this wonderful princely girl 💘 i really want to be able to spoil her like she does others, she deserves it!!!! Shes so smart if you call her dumb we r not friends (lighthearted) it isn’t nice :(

MASUKI SATOU BANDORI ^w^ ahhhhhhh so so so cute!! ♡ she reminds me of applejack who i also like :> butches who bake..I LOVE her personality & voice & the way she calls things Cute & her muscles & >///<

MISAKI OKUSAWA BANDORI sorry for all the bandori it’s not all bandori i prommy. MISAKIII shes WONDERFUL!!!!!!!!! TwT aaahh..REALLYY adore the sort of caretaking role she plays & shes so comforting & handsome & pretty & aauauahh 😳🙈

ms. info play together!! gosh this one is silly she only Really shows up in the tutorial (i feel GROSSLY robbed btw) but i liked her immediately and whenever i get to deliver her pizza i feel very very happy ..<3 her name is so cool i love it.

SHIHO HINOMORI PROJECT SEKAI!! SHES SOOOOOO!!!!!!!! She is also so handsome and comforting i adore masculine girls in hoodies eebhbh. Its jsut. I’ve said this before but masc anime women literally look so warm and huggable let me fall into your arms Now. Youre my dream. NE WAY!!!!!!! She is so precious to me.. i want to collect so many stuffed animals with her and we can go to the theme park all the time on dates!!!!!!!!!! <<3

TOMOE UDAGAWA BANDORI AHHHHH ♡♡♡ LITERALLY. GIRL ❤️❤️❤️‍🔥 my baaaby..I DISTINCTLY remember the first time i saw her in the game she was threatening ppl for littering & i fell in love ON THE SPOT. shes got such a cool aesthetic & again looks so safe & huggable & shes just delightful to b around.. shes a big sister & very caring & VERY VERY cool!!! i love how she dresses she is my angel

YURI DDLC!!!! <3 i dream abt us recovering together she is so lovely and i wanna cuddle with her. she looks soft & has pretty hair ….shes just smart & pretty & ggonna…..hold she ♡

#🍎#ask to tag #long post

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themutantunderground · 7 years ago

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Single Parent AU

John is raising a daughter on his own, working at Xavier's, and balancing "superhero" duties when Clarice moves into his apartment building. He's curious about her but he’s too busy for a relationship, right? Still...she’s intriguing. On her end, Clarice isn't sure what to make of John and his daughter. It's better to not get close to people, but it's also nice to be wanted.

Read on Ao3 | FF.net

John woke up before his alarm clock, like usual, and rolled out of bed, bare feet hitting the hardwood floor. He could hear Riley still sleeping in her room down the hall, her little whistling breaths faint and even, and the automatic coffee pot was already bubbling to life. That thing was on its last leg, and if it busted, he would have to somehow convince Forge to fix it or get a new one.

Forcing himself to his feet, John ran his hands through his messy hair. He needed a shower, but he had to get Riley moving first. She always took forever in the morning, which would make him late for work and her late for school.

Padding down the hallway, John pushed Riley's door open and stepped over the minefield of stuffed animals. Seriously, the kid's collection of plush animals seemed to get bigger every week. He suspected Lorna of sneaking new toys to Riley. Or maybe one of the other kids in the building had a duplication power…there was that new family that had moved in a couple weeks ago.

Bending down, John shook Riley by the shoulder. "Hey, squirt, time to get up."

Her bright pink and black wings twitched and then spread, coming up to cover her head. "Nuh…"

"Yes," he said, pulling the blankets back, "You gotta get ready for school."

Riley sat up and folded her wings over herself entirely, hiding behind them. "I'm asleep. Shh."

John smirked and picked her up by the waist, tucking her under his arm like a football. He was careful with her, watching out as they squeezed past the doorframe. All the while, Riley made exaggerated snoring noises, like she could possibly sleep through this. Once they were in the living room, John tossed the five-year-old onto the couch and turned on the news. "You have ten minutes to wake up."

Riley popped up, clinging to the back of the couch. "But I'm very asleep!"

"Ten minutes."

"Ugh!" She flung herself back onto the cushions, and the blanket that was slung over the back of the couch slid down, tug by tug.

With Riley on her way to actually waking up, John headed back to his room and quickly showered and got dressed. He and Riley were supposed to be at Xavier's in about an hour, and it would take at least thirty minutes to drive there. His towel around his neck, John headed back into the kitchen and turned on the stove before heading over to the couch. Riley was curled up in a little ball, her wings curled around her. Those wings were a lot less delicate than they looked; he should know, he had been walloped enough with them. Leaning over the back of the couch, he tickled her neck, getting her to twitch and wriggle.

"Dad!" she yelped, rooting into the cushions.

"I said ten minutes, and time's up," he said, bobbing her against the cushions with both hands, "So wake up. I'm making pancakes."

That got her to sit up, batting away at his hands. "Blueberry?"

"Is that what you want?"

"Yep, yuh-huh." She pushed her wild pink and black striped hair out of her face. Her skin was light violet, like lilacs. Lorna always said Riley looked like she had stepped out a kids' fairy tale book, a pixie come to life, and John guessed that was about right. She was like a small bit of magic, one that he had sworn to raise and protect when he had adopted her five years ago.

"Then I'm making cucumber pancakes." John gave her hair a gentle tug and pointed to a hairbrush on the coffee table. "Start working on that rat's nest you call hair, squirt."

"Not cucumber," Riley said, wrinkling her nose. She grabbed the brush and scrambled up to sit on the back of the couch, using her wings to balance as she perched up there. Brushing her hair, she watched him grab the pancake mix out of the cabinet.

"No? How about fish pancakes?" He picked up a bowl from the drying rack and dumped pancake mix into it. "Or peanut butter pancakes."

"No, blueberry."

"Oh, okay, I hear you, grass pancakes—"

Riley made a whining sound and dropped back onto the couch, disappearing from view. John could hear her grumbling to herself about how much she wanted blueberry pancakes and wondering if they were out of blueberries and how grass would make 'icky yucky pancakes.' Over by the stove, he tried not to laugh. So dramatic. "Go get your school clothes on and we'll see what kind of pancakes we end up with."

She commando-crawled out from behind the couch and spread out, stomach-down, on the hardwood floor. "Can I wear my Moana dress?"

"No, you can wear a long-sleeve and jeans plus some socks, it's cold." He swished the pancake batter around one final time and started pouring it into the pan he had set on the stovetop. "You can pick whatever you want as long as it's one of each. And two socks."

"Socks gotta match?"

"Go wild."

Riley jumped up and took off down the hall, and he could hear her going through her closet and drawers while he finished the blueberry pancakes. Stacking them on a plate, he grabbed his tablet and settled down at the table. "Riles! C'mon, move it, these ketchup pancakes are getting cold."

She wandered back in, clutching a handful of socks and wearing a grey t-shirt and blue jeans. "I can't decide."

"Bring them here," he said, holding out a hand. Riley darted over and climbed up in the seat beside his before putting her socks on the table. She sniffed at her pancakes and then smiled at him. "Blueberry!"

"No way, they're ketchup."

"Are not."

John pointed a fork at her plate. "Go on and eat. And you should wear the pink cat and that pony one."

"The pony sock is Applejack, Daddy."

John shrugged and popped half a pancake into his mouth. "Orange country horse sock, then."

Riley ate daintily, and John side-eyed her when he caught her picking the blueberries out of the pancakes. She grinned and went back to eating the whole pancake. John made a face at his tablet and the emails he was reading. Two of his students were freaking out over the upcoming mid-semester exam and a third was trying to weasel out of it entirely. As a teacher who specialized in coaching young mutants to use their powers, John had a number of students with a variety of powers and a wide range of personalities to match.

"There's someone moving in."

"Hey, stop spying," John said, glancing up from his tablet. Riley was up from the table, which he had noticed while reading emails, but now she perched in the window seat. "Come back and finish your pancakes before I eat them for you."

"You won't," Riley said with complete certainty. She pressed her hands to the window, sticky syrup fingers getting goo all over the glass. Her wings spread a little. "It's somebody new. The lady moving in."

"Well, people who are just moving in are normally new." John finished off his pancakes and headed over to see what, or really who, Riley was looking at. He leaned over her, one hand against the window frame.

There was a moving truck out front, and a woman helping the movers. Her hair glinted purple in the autumn sun, and her eyes as she looked up at them were a bright, impossible, striking green, like jade. That's when John realized that she had caught them watching her, and great, wasn't this awkward.

Luckily, five-year-olds are good at fixing that sort of thing. Riley waved at the woman and her wings fluttered. The woman blinked and then waved back hesitantly, like she couldn't decide if she should or not. John gave a similar wave before ruffling Riley's hair and turning away from the window so he didn't make the impression of being Mr. Creeper on the Fifth Floor.

Riley tapped her fingers against the glass. "She's pretty."

John flicked his eyes at his daughter, who was eager for him to get married. She didn't look up at him, but she hummed to herself. "Ri, no."

"I just said she's pretty!"

"Go eat your pancakes…" While Riley rolled her eyes and headed back to the table, John stole a second glance out the window. Okay. Fine.

She was pretty.

#thunderblink #single parent au #clarice fong #john proudstar

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rantsaboutponies · 7 years ago

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Season 7 Retrospective

Well, we’re between highly anticipated movie releases this weekend (for me, anyway), so it’s time for our annual look back over the season!

Good lord, the beginning of Season 7 seemed like so long ago. I could have sworn the Flurry Heart episode was last season. Maybe this has just been a really long year. Well...okay, yeah, I can certainly see why it would feel that way, given the year this has been.

With a rating of 4-9-13 (W-L-T), this season must have been better than the last one, even if it didn’t feel like it. Season 8 is forthcoming, so how long before Hasbro gives up and reboots the series again? Only time will tell.

So, here we are. From best to worst:

#1. “Secrets and Pies”: This episode was...good? Like, really, really good? Why? I don’t get it! I wouldn't be so confused if you guys did this more often! I swear, the next time this happens, I'm going to get whiplash!

#2. “Rock Solid Friendship”: To complement the really good Pinkie Pie episode, here’s an episode that was really good in every way except Pinkie Pie! They’re at exact opposite ends of the season, too. Maybe it’s an equivalent exchange thing.

#3. “Triple Threat”: I thought this episode did a pretty good job of avoiding the “why don’t you just tell them?” problem that virtually every episode of every sitcom runs into. We’ve already established that Thorax is a whiny little milquetoast weenie and that Ember is a heinous prick who doesn’t listen to anybody but herself. Hell, that was the entire reason for the conflict in the first place! Honestly, why would Spike try to reason with either of them?

#4. “To Change a Changeling”: If the monster hadn’t turned out to be a giant mole, the ending battle might have seemed a little more life-threatening. That, Starlight’s very, very stupid plan, and Pharynx’s abusive ass made this episode a little worse than it should have been. Apart from that, though, I liked it!

And now here’s the hardest part of the list: trying to figure out which “tie” episodes were slightly better or worse than all the others.

#5. “Once Upon a Zeppelin”: Yeah, Twilight’s parents were annoying (and idiots), but not to the point that I’m going to dread them ever showing up in any future episodes (unlikely as that is at this point). Plus, bringing back Iron Will actually seemed to have a point, and it helped that he didn’t have to “unlearn” his lesson from his first appearance just to make the current episode make sense.

#6. “Uncommon Bond”: This episode went out of its way to prove that yes, Starlight and Sunburst really do have only one thing in common. I would have expected the resolution to be the realization that the two of them liked more things than just that board game, but nope! Giant version! That’s it!

#7. “Daring Done?”: I was so distracted this episode that I forgot to mention that Pinkie Pie was actually acting like Pinkie Pie and not an annoying little shitbag! It was refreshing! But anyway, you’d think Daring-Do would have written enough books by this point to realize the obvious tropes this episode followed. The real challenge for her is going to be stretching this adventure out to novel-length.

#8. “Discordant Harmony”: I’m still not sure what made Discord think he needed to change a bunch of shit about his house to make Fluttershy happy. It looked the same way he made her house look every time he visited her. What did he think she was expecting?

#9. “A Health of Information”: This is the second episode in a row on this list where Fluttershy acted kind of like a doofus throughout the episode for no discernible reason. It also proved that unicorns are the solution to everything. Need to grab some moss from a swamp without falling in? Unicorn! Need to collect honey from the flash bees without going anywhere near them? Unicorn! Need to destroy an entire planet without breaking a sweat? Unicron!

#10 & #11. “Shadow Play (Parts 1 and 2)”: The first half fools you into thinking this isn’t just going to be a run-of-the-mill finale episode by promising you a halfway interesting quest before immediately giving you all the artifacts within a few minutes. Ha! Gotcha!

#12. “Hard to Say Anything”: I’d kind of hoped we were past the whole “two men competing for the trophy that is the personality-deprived female character” cliché, especially in a show designed for children, but I guess not. I mean, at least Big Mac and Feather do realize that’s what they’re doing by the end, but that doesn’t fix Sugar Belle’s “sexy lamp” issue.

#13. “A Royal Problem”: Has Twilight been of help to any friendship-related issues since she stopped being the main character? I think these episodes must be based on Twilight's memoirs, i.e. this isn't how things actually happened; this is how she remembers them happening. Here's what really happened during "Magical Mystery Cure":

Twilight Sparkle: So...I accidentally totally and completely fucked up my friends’ lives, but then I fixed it! That means I'm good at having friends, right?

Princess Celestia (sarcastically): Oh, yeah, you're a regular princess of friendship.

Twilight Sparkle: *gasp* Really?!

Princess Celestia: Oh, no, I didn't mean– Ah, crap, the music's already started. ♫ You've come such a long, long way... ♫

Princess Celestia (mentally): I've really got to stop using the word “princess” as an insult. This is the third one this week. I'm running out of castles! She'll just have to stay in the library until I can find another one.

#14. “All Bottled Up”: This episode is a perfect example of why the writers typically just don’t include characters in an episode if they have nothing to do in said episode. That escape room nonsense was just stupid. The six of you might be best friends, but you have never gotten along that well!

#15. “Celestial Advice”: Ugh, this one. “As a teacher, I have to send my student away. I don’t know exactly why I have to do that, but I’m sure I’ll figure the reason out later. Oh, wait, you don’t want to leave? Well, that changes everything! You can stay!” I think they were making this one up as they went along.

#16. “The Perfect Pear”: One of the emptiest “love” stories I’ve ever seen. This was an “attraction story”, if you can even call it that. This is another case where I’m positive that at least a hundred better fanfics had been written about this exact story before the episode was released. I get why people have headcanons about things now. Why wouldn’t you have a fanon when the canon is so...weak?

#17. “Honest Apple”: Once again, we have a brand-new writer for this episode. Kevin Lappin was very likely just given a slip of paper with “APPLEJACK = HONEST” written on it, which constituted the entire material he had to work with. That might explain why Applejack was such an unlikable prick for the entire episode.

Whoo... All right. Here we go.

#18. “A Flurry of Emotions”: If you don’t want to watch your kid (because, seriously, you’ve got better things to do), just show up at one of your relatives’ houses one day and dump it on them. They’ll have such a guilt trip that they’ll be glad to accept! But make sure it’s someone who’s completely unqualified for the job and has a mountain of other responsibilities first. That’s the best way!

#19. “Campfire Tales”: The fact that this episode was actually just a clunky setup for the finale might explain why all three stories sucked so hard. It’s this season’s The Mummy!

#20. “Not Asking for Trouble”: Now we’re going to get into the part of the list where I have to figure out which episodes are worse by balancing how much the episode irritated me in general with how toxic the moral is. Trust me, if your children’s show has a moral of “Do what you want to do for other people, regardless of what those people have explicitly told you not to do, because you’ll end up being right in the end. After all, people don’t know what they want!”, you’ve fucked up something awful.

#21. “Fluttershy Leans In”: I said in this review that this felt like the MLP version of The Fountainhead, but I only just recently realized that I also said the same thing about Season 5's "Canterlot Boutique". Given that the episodes were written by different people, this must be a storyline that creative types really like (even if it’s nothing more than a power fantasy).

#22. “It Isn’t the Mane Thing About You”: All right, you actually had a good idea with this one. Despite being the Element of Generosity, one of Rarity's main problems has always been her vanity. That means you pulled off the rare feat of making the moral both 1. something the character hasn't already learned in a previous episode and 2. something that a normal functioning member of society might not automatically possess. (There has been a distressing number of lessons in the past five seasons or so that don't fit one or both of these qualifications.) It's just a shame you crashed and burned so spectacularly by 1. turning the moral from “don't be vain” to “have confidence” (something Rarity has never struggled with AND which you have already had as the moral in MULTIPLE previous episodes) and 2. went about it in the most nonsensical way possible!

#23. “Parental Glideance”: This one was a little sickening. The “my parents are so embarrassing!” trope is bad enough, but you’re an adult, Rainbow Dash! Grow up! If the things your parents are doing embarrass you (or if they’re legitimately dangerous, like SHOOTING FIREWORKS OFF AT AN AIRSHOW), talk to them! You can do that without snapping and acting like a dick!

#24. “Forever Filly”: Holy crap, I have never wanted to punch a fictional cartoon character in the face as badly as I did in this episode. I don’t know what made Sweetie Belle act like such a little shit or why Rarity is so out of touch with her (seeing as Sweetie Belle would have had to have been about four to be into the stuff she was trying to do), but I hated this. Shove your black box experimental theater up your ass.

#25. “Marks and Recreation”: I got the sense from the beginning of the series that cutie marks were originally supposed to be something really deep and meaningful. I mean, they’re your passion. They represent that thing that you love so much and are so good at that you can spend the rest of your life doing it and wearing a permanent symbol of it on your body. Well, not anymore! Now it’s just some obligatory shit that you get because you have to and that doesn’t have any real meaning at all! Fuck you! Just...fuck you!

#26. “Fame and Misfortune”: Yeah, no surprise there. Holy shit, this was a painful experience. Like “Stranger Than Fan Fiction”, this was just embarrassing to watch. To quote somebody else, “...you don't get back at critics by attacking them, you do it by ignoring them and continuing to be awesome.” Hell, this episode's moral is contradicted by its own existence. “You shouldn't be affected by criticism of your work. That’s why I wrote this episode where all my critics are painted as raving lunatics and I am totally the victim!” The fact that this is the SECOND such episode is just pathetic. This one actually manages to be worse, though, because, unlike the earlier episode when it was just Quibble Pants being a dick, this one paints the ENTIRE fandom as either complaining whiners who hate everything or creepy stalkers who follow everywhere you go. Nothing says “we want you to keep watching” like insulting the few fans you have left right to their face!

Remember, next week is the review of the remaining six Equestria Girls: Summertime Shorts. Be there!

#my little pony: friendship is magic #my little pony friendship is magic #my little pony #friendship is magic #mlp fim #mlp #fim #my little pony spoilers #mlp spoilers #spoilers #season 7 retrospective #retrospective

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sugaranspikes · 8 years ago

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because I’m getting excited about bronycon (august, baby!!), have a brony au with our favorite boys!

(and please, no hating on mlp or bronies, this is just for fun)(also, warning: super long!!)

the boys all got into mlp at various times. it was kind of like dominos - once one started watching it out of curiosity by it’s popularity, another one would catch them in the act. chirps would inevitably ensue, but days later the theme song would be heard, barely at a possible decibel for the human ear, from the same guy’s room. and on it went, until a lecture from a very loud, drunk shitty about society’s expectations on men and saying “fuck you” to the system forced them to ponder on their shame for watching a show for little girls. they came to the conclusion - who the fuck cares? they were allowed to enjoy whatever they wanted as long as it didn’t hurt anybody, and it was a good show. this allowed them to get more comfortable with the idea and finally watch the show together in the living room on saturday mornings.

eventually when they become big enough fans, they realize bronycon is happening in baltimore, maryland - a mere 6 hours from samwell! (boston, really). and of course, if they’re going to be going, they need to create cosplays!!

obviously, bitty is the quintessential pinkie pie. with his zest for life, baking, and parties galore, he embodies her persona. in his pink short shorts, pink button down over a cutie mark t-shirt, and ridiculously patterned knee socks, he zips around the convention like a butterfly, charming everyone he meets. he also brings pies to share with the convention-goers that don’t want to pay $10 for a piece of pizza. he likes to go the social media forums such as Equestria Daily as well as the YouTubers, to learn how to make himself an even bigger online presence.

jack never really got into MLP like everyone else did, but he definitely appreciates the messages. he watches episodes as background noise to his studying or hockey-play creating, and thinks about the kids he taught in pee-wee hockey and how much they’d like this show. he’s not entirely sure the names of all the ponies (the pink one is definitely Pinkie Pie, right? And the rainbow one is Rainbow Fast? or something) but the boys beg him to join them and he acquiesces. they dub him applejack, the down to earth pony who doesn’t take crap from anyone and is as strong as a bull. he is a great foil to everyone else’s crazy antics, and he’s happy to take as many photos as possible of all the great costumes and crowds. (and the boys forgive him when he looks at his fake tail tucked into his jeans and asks “who am I again?” mostly because in a cowboy hat and boots he is knocking everyone dead). oh, and freckles, ya’ll.

lardo, to no one’s surprise, immediately claims rainbow dash. they all argue for a bit because EVERYONE wants to be rainbow dash, but with a lift of her eyebrow the decision is finalized. she goes all the way and dyes her hair all the colors of the rainbow, claiming she had wanted to do it for awhile. she rocks a letterman jacket with rainbow’s cutie mark as well as sneakers and some cute gym shorts. she goes to the art panels as well as those that teach artists how to break into cartooning and such. it’s not her usual type of art, but it’s always good stuff to know.

ransom becomes the show’s star herself, twilight sparkle. with his anxiety about school and need to be the best in all things education, he is the best to capture twilight’s adorkable nature. plus, with his connections to everyone on campus and his innumerable facebook friends, he the best candidate for the princess of friendship. in his purple sweater vest and fake wings he scours the marketplace for rare merchandise. he is definitely the collector of the group, collecting mostly adult merchandise that should not be played with, such as the funko figurines. seriously, holster once tried to touch them. he will not make that mistake again.

holster, for his part, makes a great rarity. he claims to be the “fashionista” of the group, for his part in constantly trying to throw out ransom’s salmon shorts. everyone loudly disagrees, many stating he has the fashion sense of a white jock, but he holds his head high, dammit! it also helps that he plays piano, as rarity plays a key-tar in equestria girls. the group is horribly split between those who think of eqg as canon and those who don’t. he wears a white suit vest and pants with a purple shirt underneath, and goes to all the forums with the horse-famous as the key speakers because he idolizes them.

shitty, for his part, makes an extremely loud fluttershy. while not even in the vicinity of the same personality group, he extols fluttershy’s virtues as one of the characters with the most personality development in the show, and will tell anyone who will listen that he is an advocate for the shy and those who feel like doormats. in a yellow crop top with her cutie mark and a pink skirt, he draws crowds with his soapbox speeches and wild flowing hair. he likes to go to forums with the show’s creators and directors to ask questions about feminism, the matriarchy, and bronyhood. and for the love of god do NOT let him out on the streets, because he will confront any scoffing bystander with the question “does this threaten your fragile masculinity?!”

the frogs don’t actually go to bronycon, but the boys coerce them into dressing up as the cutie mark crusaders for a photoshoot before the con. dex is the long suffering apple bloom, arguably the leader of the group and the one most down to earth. chowder gets to be the sweet and excitable sweetie belle, while nursey is the talented but disabled scootaloo. the pictures start out nice, but quickly devolve into pictures of the three of them squabbling and falling over each other in an attempt to tug at each other’s pigtails. so, it actually turned out perfect.

imagine everyone’s surprise when they are walking through the con and come across tango and whisky as derpy and starlight glimmer, respectively. tango gets excited, asking “when did you get here? are you having fun? when did you make your costumes? do you like my costume? I’m derpy! well technically i’m muffins but I don’t like that they changed the name because it was completely unnecessary-”

whiskey just looks mortified and mutters a gruff “hello.” the boys sense his discomfort and comment on his outfit, ripped jeans and a t-shirt with starlight’s logo on it. it's interesting that he’s dressed as one of the most controversial characters on the show, though no one points that out.

and finally, when a few years have passed and jack and kent have become friendly again, kent insists on joining them for the next convention as sunset shimmer. “it’s ironic and fitting! plus she’s a fucking badass!” since he and jack are both famous in the NHL now their pictures are taken constantly, kent is not afraid to flirt with the camera. it’s a controversial topic in the sports world because of the oddity, but he takes it in stride and it goes a long way for help people come to terms with bronies.

after all, what are they but people who are fans of a show with cute ponies, a great message and engaging characters?

#aaaaaahhhh this took forever #had to get it out though #omgcp #brony #bronies #my little pony #mlp #omgcheckplease #op #headcanon #brony au

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kinuskikakku · 7 years ago

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My Little Pony: FiM s07e14 review-ish

Okay, so! I've been watching My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic for years now. And in general, the show is… fine. Like it's not the best, it has some issues, but for the most part it's just fine and I generally don't see anything all that wrong or harmful with it. It's fine for what it is.

However, I have to talk about the 14th episode of season 7. ”Fame and Misfortune”. And to open my general thoughts on this, the episode seemed in a lot of places rather petty and excessively defensive from the writers, like they were making excuses for themselves. So, spoilers (obviously), the basic premise is that Twilight and the others decide to make copies of their old friendship journal and distribute it for all to read. And this backfires on them.

Now, clearly, parts of this were pointing out and kind of having fun with the way the fandom around this show is. Which itself could be fine, it's nice when shows give nods to their fans in some way. But really, like I said earlier, this seemed to be really petty and like it was more attacking the people who dare to criticize the show and/or its writing.

Parts of this were actually pretty fun and great, such as the rabid Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash fans. And while some portions did give out acceptable arguments, they still seemed either petty or like they were missing the point.

And now, I’m the first one to say I might not have gotten everything here, since I really am not part of the fandom that way, so I don't exactly know what goes on there or what are the general views and whatnot on certain characters. And I'll go through the episode piece by piece and laying some commentary on it.

So the episode opens up with Twilight Sparkle going around Ponyville and running into two kids having a spat, and then... it completely and totally skips over whatever their issue was and Twilight summarizing how ”friendship is always worth fighting for!” Which… okay, but like... the scene felt just.. so DEAD. Regardless, this reminded Twilight of something and back at her castle, she looked up her old friendship journal.

So, as I said, the scene with the kids seemed just... bad. And if the only point was for Twilight to get the idea to look for the damn journal, why go about it like this? You could've just opened the episode up with her, say, cleaning the place and coming across it by chance. That wouldn't have really changed anything.

Well, next up Twilight calls all her friends to come by, and they reminiscence over the journal, then deciding to make copies and distribute it for everyone to read and learn from, and so they do. But rather quickly things go… sour.

First Twilight runs into some fans who came ALL the way from wherever to get the books signed, and prattled on about ”mint condition”, which I'm sure was a poke at the parts of the fandom who prefer keeping their collectibles and whatnot in mint condition. Which is okay. It was a harmless joke and was just fine.

Next up Twilight runs into some ponies discussing Rarity and her character – namely that she is a self-centered ponycunt or whatever. And this launches Rarity into a neurotic depression. Which, granted, is probably something some viewers criticize the character for. And at this point, the episode is still relatively fine. I mean, sure, my personal views on Rarity might differ from the general views, but hey, that's a different story.

Next up Twilight runs into Pinkie Pie, and encounters some rabid Pinkie Pie fans. This here, for me at least, was a pretty funny scene, where these fans would literally laugh at everything Pinkie says or does, no matter if it's funny or not. And really, that’s how I see a lot of fans of this character, so while I think it was a fair joke, it started to feel a bit... mean.

Moving on, we get to see Rainbow and some rabid Rainbow Dash fans. Which, yes... I'm fully aware of Rainbow's excessive popularity and whatnot. Though this felt... eh to me, mostly because I personally see Rainbow Dash as this egotistical and absolutely self-absorbed ponyhole. Like this brief portion didn't really have much for me to talk about. Although, this portion did seem to imply that Twilight’s personal lessons and stories in the past have been ”boring”. Which... I guess some people think that? But again, since I'm bit of an outsider here, I can't really comment on that.

Next up comes Fluttershy, and here the writers seem to get REALLY petty and defensive, kind of pointing out the fans and viewers who have criticized Fluttershy's episodes and whatnot in the past. ”Why does Fluttershy keep learning the same thing over and over again?” which is something I used to ask quite a lot as well. Now, Fluttershy DOES have a line here that is actually a good point about how someone can't just learn to change how they are after one or two lessons.

Although, while it's a good point, I think whoever wrote this seem to have missed what's the actual gripe that the ”nasty critics” have. The problem – at least for me – never was that Fluttershy needed multiple episodes dedicated to the themes of assertiveness and self-confidence. But rather that all of these episodes in the past were more or less the exact same.

There is SO much you could do with the basic themes of learning to be assertive and self-confident, but instead of exploring its many avenues, the show often ended up going for the same pony manure every single time. Also, for some reason they seemed to imply at the end of this part that some fans are like... flip-floppers with their opinions? Okay...

Next up, after a brief visit to see Rarity going insane at a fast pace, we go to see the Apple Family, where Applejack is surrounded by... I don't even know what... cosplayers? These ”Sweet Apple Admirers” seem to dress up in outfits to imitate the western styles of the Apple Family, and... just.. hang out and.. wanna be part of the Apple Family. Which is a conundrum to be sure.

What I'm trying to figure out is whether this is supposed to point to cosplayers or the parts of the fandom who... like... get WAY too into the show, because it could be either. Or both. And frankly, this part of the episode just... confused me so much that I can't really comprehend what the flick is going on.

So, next up we get to Twilight's castle where all her friends gather together to escape the fandom. And here the group ends up having a song number ”we're not flawless, we're a work in progress!” Which is a fine sentiment, but it’s like the writers REALLY are missing the point of some of the people criticizing the show.

The issue isn't wanting flawlessness (at least I hope); flaws and quirks are good and expected of the characters. The real issue is that the characters have been a ”work in progress” for almost ten years now! Like I'll be real here, I totally get that the showrunners want to keep it loose, accessible and easy to jump in at any point. That's why the show goes for the more episodic approach. But when at the same time they try having an overarching plot and a passage of time (mostly through season openers and finales) it gets REALLY contradictory there. I'm not saying they can't be done at the same time but it's really difficult.

And yeah, I get it. The six characters are basically stereotypes of archetypes. And it would mess up the dynamics of the show if they changed too much. But really, you CAN have noticeable character development AND keep the character's main archetypes intact.

But yeah, after the song number at the end of the episode, some little kids come in and they're all like, ”hey, the book was TOTES awesome yo! We liked it!”, and that was our happy ending somehow. And this here culminates it all. IT's like this petty festivity of defensiveness and making up excuses was here just to say one big ”FUCK YOU” to any older fans of the show. It's basically like with this ending they're saying: ”Hey, it's for kids, don't take it so seriously!”

Which is just the laziest and stupidest excuse for the writers to be thoughtless and lazy. If people didn't take cartoons more seriously we wouldn't have stuff like Avatar or Steven Universe. We'd still be in the trappings of early 2000s where the philosophy truly seemed to be ”why put in any efforts if it's just for kids?”

With this, I'm out, and thank you to anyone who bothered reading all this. Those who agree, good for you. Those who disagree, you're welcome to send me your hatemail.

(at least they didn’t bring up bronyporn or the people who have pony waifus)

#my little pony #friendship is magic #mlp #mlp fim #review #kind of #ranting

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ponydiscordmod · 8 years ago

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Ponyville High School Reunion *Fanfiction*

Ponyville High School Reunion

By Kendell2 and Alexwarlorn (First Half)

Commissioned by Alexwarlorn (Second Half)

"Don't you think we're a little overdressed, Rarity?" Cheerilee asked as the group trotted along.

"Nonsense darling! Whatever gave you that idea?"

"...The amethyst necklace," Cheerilee asked, looking down at the gem set in gold around her neck and the fancy purple dress she was now being forced to wear. She'd wanted to wear a simple dress, but Rarity was Rarity. "And the fact you're wearing a fancy tiara."

"And what's wrong with that? It's just a simple thing I put together, it's not like I'm dressed for the Gala. Besides, amethyst goes perfect with your coat," the fashionista replied, adjusting her perfectly done mane.

Cheerilee's response was a flat look. "That IS your gala dress!"

Rarity gave an insulted look. "No it's not! That dress was magenta! This one is pink!"

The school teacher gave a sigh. "What I'm saying is that we're going to a high school reunion, not the Canterlot Garden Party."

"Of course not. I have a completely different dress set aside for that."

"...The colts are going to have a field day with this…" Cheerilee muttered under her breath. "How do you even handle making these dresses for yourself while also running three boutiques? It'd drive me insane from stress."

Rarity gave a proud look. "Simple, darling! I have ways of venting my stress."

"Like your fainting couch?"

"Yes. And it's a chaise lounge, not a couch. Oh look! Here comes Applejack and Big Macintosh!"

Cheerilee jumped a little. She absentmindedly adjusted her necklace and fixed a bit of her mane that was out of place.

"Shoot Rare, think yer fancy enough?" Applejack questioned as she trotted over, the farmer having simply given her hat a good cleaning and taken a hot bath. Big Macintosh was just wearing a simple dress vest, nothing fancy. Though he was missing his signature yoke around his neck.

Cheerilee blushed a little under her fur at the sight of Big Mac dressed up.

"If anything, Applejack, you look a little dressed down. How much effort you put into your appearance when you've agreed to meet somepony says how seriously you take meeting them," Rarity commented, looking her friend over.

Applejack rolled her eyes. "Well Ah've only got one or two dresses and they're all super fancy. Mainly cause you made 'em. Only other option was Granny Smith's old weddin' dress and the dang thing is older than Ah am! Yah want meh tah wear that?"

"Nope." The mares looked at Big Mac. "Erm . . . it's still a beautiful wedding dress."

Cheerilee blushed deeper.

"Yeah, in her time. but it ain't mah style..." Applejack replied simply. “That thing's so frilly it'd make Rarity blush.”

"It can't be worse than what our manes looked like when we were younger," Cheerilee remarked with a small chuckle.

Rarity shuddered. "Fashion trends have certainly changed from those dark days..."

"Ah think that's the one time meh and you are gonna agree on fashion Rarity," Applejack replied, recalling it herself. "Good thing Fluttershy hadn't moved inta Ponyville yet! If yah visited her, her bees mighta mistook your mane for a hive!"

They shared a laugh.

"...She's actually right, mother was in town and went to Fluttershy's and...well, it wasn't pretty…" Rarity said giving a horrified tremble. "...There was honey everywhere…"

"She got stung?" Cheerilee asked with a look of concern on her face.

"No, just covered in honey…They were Fluttershy's bees after all." Rarity then happily asked with a whoosh of her mane. "So any of you remember how to do your mane like that? The latest trend magazines say it's coming back into style."

"...I still have pictures…" Cheerilee replied with a blush.

Applejack sighed and rolled her eyes. "Ah wonder if yer crazy mane when we beat Lord Tirek had anythin' tah do with that."

Rarity narrowed her eyes. "My mane was not crazy! It was fashionable!"

"It's a form fer fightin' evil, why does it need tah be?"

"Why does Super Stallion wear tights? To dazzle and inspire those he saved!"

"Girls!" Cheerilee interjected with a practiced school teacher voice. "If we start arguing, we'll miss the reunion."

"Yes Miss Cheerilee!" everypony replied, as if that voice compelled such an answer.

"I see she has you well trained." Rarity said to Big Mac with a smirk.

"HEY!" The others snapped.

Rarity gave a chuckle. "Only joking darlings."

"She home schooled me when we were foals, what yer excuse?" Big Mac asked, narrowing his eyes.

"She learned from our high school teacher."

"...Okay, that makes sense…"

The group began to make their way along. She noticed a few other ponies heading the same way as them.

"Let's just hope our usual luck doesn't cause Chrysalis tah rear her ugly head again…" Applejack said.

"Applejack!" everypony yelled again.

"Just bein' honest. We could also have-"

"Don't start, darling," Rarity warned with a glare.

"Ah'm hopin' if Ah say somethin' bad'll happen, it's temptin' fate the other way," the orange pony replied. She didn't consciously acknowledge the fact Chrysalis only had a handful of drones left and most of the Changeling population were part of King Thorax's hive. Except Kevin. Kevin was neutral.

Rarity blinked. "Oh...Still, don't start."

"Besides, what cou-" Cheerilee found a hoof covering her mouth.

"Don't say that either!" said Applejack and Rarity at the same time.

[hr]

-Somewhere nearby-

"Maybe pirates could crash into the gym with a huge pirate ship! Or maybe zombies could burst in! Or maybe a dimensional rift will open up in the middle of the dance floor! Or maybe somepony will have a magic ring that'll turn us all into foals or turns the stallions into mares and the mares into stallions! Or maybe aliens could land! Or maybe somepony will have an artifact from another universe that turns them into a raging she-demon! Or maybe a bunch of glowing pegasi will come down through the skylight I'm looking forward to seeing again!. . . I'm waiting! Seriously, I'm not expecting any of that at all! . . . Come'on no fair!"

[hr]

-further away but closing in-

"...And that is how I convinced those trolls that pink and lace was better than dirty loin cloths," Rarity said, as if this discussion was perfectly mundane.

"And how did you convince them not to keep you in their personal doll collection?" Cheerilee asked.

"Oh, that's simple, I gave them some of my equinikins with pretty dresses instead. I had to make a lot more dresses to go with them..."

"Your lives are so weird…" the school teacher sighed.

"Ah know, always thought the adventure nuts in class would end up in bein' the one's in crazy situations," Applejack replied. "...Well, they kinda do, but not as much as we do."

"I don't," Cheerilee replied. "No more than the rest of Ponyville. Most adventurous thing to ever happen to me was the...well..." she blushed slightly, looking at Big Macintosh, who did much the same. "You get the point. And that was quite enough adventure for me."

"Once more, I apologize for the inconvenience our little sisters...and Scootaloo caused you. I do hope Twilight is doing okay as foalsitter…" Rarity said with a sincerely apologetic tone. “Especially with Starlight visiting Sunburst.”

"Oh what's the worst that could happen?" Applejack asked, then covered her mouth quickly. "...Ah said it, didn't Ah?"

[hr]

"Wow! Ah didn't realize just how big is yer new castle Princess Twilight!" Apple Bloom called, darting around excitedly.

Twilight fidgeted slightly. "It's pretty big I suppose. It's got a library...bigger than my entire old house…"

"Wow! Have you gotten to see EVERY room?!" Sweetie Belle asked excitedly.

"Well, no...not quite yet-"

"Really?!" Scootaloo finished.

"Uh oh…"

"CUTIE MARK CRUSADER CASTLE EXPLORERS! YAY!"

Sweetie Belle giggled. “I forgot how fun it was to do that since we got our Cutie Marks!”

Twilight and Spike uncovered their ringing ears. "Why can't Zecora foalsit them?" the small drake questioned, shaking his head to clear it.

The Princess of Friendship sighed. "Not until she fixes her gateway to the astral plane . . . they broke the lock."

Spike's eyes widened. "Uh...speaking of gateways, don't we have one of those?"

Twilight's irises shrunk to pinpricks. "...Horseapples!"

"Welcome to Equestria meh from another world! Can Ah see yer flank? Ah want to see if yah have yer Cutie Mark yet!"

"...What's a flank? What's a Cutie Mark?! Ah! Where are mah hands?!"

"...What are hands?"

The Princess of Friendship's eye twitched as she noticed two sets of Cutie Mark Crusaders, half of which were wearing clothing. "Ah! There's six of them now!"

Spike tapped his chin. "How come they don't get naked when they pass through while you end up with clothes when you go to their side?"

"...I need a notebook!"

[hr]

"As much as I enjoy our chit-chats dears, I believe we are already going to be fashionably late...did we take a wrong turn?" Rarity questioned, looking around.

Applejack rolled her eyes. "Come'on, we can't have taken a wrong turn, it's not that far-OW!"

The sign that AJ had so graciously introduced her face to read 'Welcome To Ponyville High-School.'

"...We're here…" the orange Earth Pony replied in a flat, slightly muffled tone.

Rarity looked at the school's signature slide, attached to the building proper for a fun exit out of the school when the bell rang. The fashionista remembered all the years she had wanted to climb up the slide when she was younger. Applejack actually had on occasion.

Cheerilee put a hoof on the sign. "Hehe...They've preserved this place pretty well...it looks like it hasn't aged a day…"

"Yes, I always felt pink was an odd choice for the school...but I admit it'd be jarring to see it anything else," Rarity allowed herself to admit with a nostalgic smile.

Applejack chuckled. "Yeah, groundskeepers always do a good job...well, except when they grab odds and ends yah accidentally left layin' around."

"Oh yes, I remember…" Cheerilee admitted with a chuckle. “But let's do our reminiscing inside.”

"Eeyup," Big Mac chimed in.

"Do you think everypony else will be here?" the fashionista asked as they headed through the doors.

"Ah don't see why not," Applejack replied. "Ah know some of 'em are the entertainment."

"Oh yes! I remember," Rarity chuckled. "Twilight should have just told us she needed music to fight music when she went back to that other world to fight the Sirens, we knew just the ponies."

Cheerilee blinked in confusion. "...I'm just going to pretend that I know what you're talking about."

The fashionista chuckled. "That's probably for the best...though I do wonder what happened to them after she beat them..."

[hr]

"Wow! You're a BIG fish!" the naked Scootaloo questioned.

"I'm a Siren you little...I mean I'm not a fish, little pony, I'm a Siren...who has no urge to rip your head off right now…" a large orange mix between a fish and a horse hissed, giving a barely subdued growl.

Scootaloo's eyes went wide. "Wow, you have big teeth…"

Spike looked to Twilight. "Uh...I'm not sure getting the Sirens to help foalsit is a good idea…"

Twilight gave a confident look. "Don't worry Spike, their powers are gone, they're just big sea ponies now. I can handle them with my eyes closed. And having their real bodies back is too important to them, they'll control themselves. If we could reform Discord, maybe we can reform them too..."

"Let us ride yah!"

"No!" the purple Siren exclaimed before two Apple Blooms jumped on her back, causing the former menace to Equestria to be comically slammed into the ground..

"Yay! That sounds like fun!" a blue one chimed, letting the Sweetie Belles on hers.

"Sonata! Have some back-bone!" Adagio growled.

"Aren't they riding on that?"

Twilight gave a sheepish look. "...Or at least punish them for their transgressions."

[hr]

"I don't know and would rather not care...But yes, hearing some 'sweet music' again in equus will be wonderful," Cheerilee replied with a chuckle

The group entered through the main door, a bell placed above it. "I think the lockers are new though," Rarity noticed, having an eye for detail. "Then again, I suppose if nothing changed it'd be more of a surprise."

“Good thing the layout's still the same,” Applejack commented, looking around the building. “Still remember which way to the gym?”

“Eeyup,” Big Macintosh replied simply, leading the way.

“Hard to miss, darling, given how often we were there,” Rarity replied.

“Yeah, because if Ah recall yah wanted tah make googly eyes at the big colt on campus,” Applejack pointed out with a smirk.

The fashionista turned her muzzle up insulted. “I did not!...Well, no more than ninety percent of the class...Though he was also a bit...”

“In love with himself?” Cheerilee commented with a small amount of bitterness.

“Yes...that...” Rarity said with a cringe, as she recalled that like many of the girls in their class, Cheerilee had had her expectations dashed rather badly by said colt. “Though good news is I hear he's much nicer now...bad news is, he's also spoken for now...”

Applejack blinked. “Really? That lug got married?”

“Yes, darling. Surprised you missed it. It was quite the high-profile wedding.”

“Well he'll probably be here, so we can always ask him,” Big Mac pointed out. “Speakin' of which, we're here,” he said, pushing over the door open to the gym.

On the other side of the door, Rarity got the distinct feeling she'd just stepped through a time warp. It was rather 'retro'. From the music to the decorations. “I see they've decided to go a nostalgic theme... Darn it, I should have worn a skirt...”

Applejack chuckled. “Told ya you were overdressed...” she said with a chuckle. “Come on, sugarcube, they had dresses back them.”

“Yes, but back then it was fashionable to wear clashing, obnoxious colors!...Not the most intelligent choice of fashion, but still!”

“Calm down, Rarity, you look beautiful,” said Cheerilee. “Besides, covering things in gemstones was more stylish back then.”

“Technically they weren't gemstones, they were rhinestones, darling,” Rarity corrected. “But point taken.”

“What's the difference? Ah thought both of 'em were just shiny stones,” Applejack commented, rubbing her head.

“Rhinestones are imitation.”

“Oh...”

Big Macintosh looked around the room, which while full of ponies, didn't quite have their entire class. “Well at least we're early. Everypony ain't here yet...”

Rarity nodded, scanning the room. “Yes, I don't see...”

“Rarity? That you?”

The fashionista's eyes went wide and she spun around to find an Earth Pony mare with a blue mane and tail, her Cutie Mark a yellow microphone with blue stars around it. She was dressed as one would expect any rock star worth their salt to appear (namely a flashy dress with lots of stars), which should be expected given that's exactly what she was. Rarity noted her mane style hadn't changed much from when they were teens.

Next to her was a golden brown furred Earth Pony stallion with blue eyes and pale yellow mane and tail, his Cutie Mark a soccer ball. He was dressed in a well made white suit, a gold ring around his right front leg. It had a large diamond in the middle shaped like a soccer ball, with a soccer team logo on it and the word 'Champion' and a number on the bottom rim.

“Melody, darling!” Rarity exclaimed, sharing a hug with the mare. “It's been so long!”

Melody chuckled and nodded. “Yeah, it has. Though not too long since I've heard of you! Boutiques in Canterlot and Manehattan? You're the talk of the town!”

Rarity gave a proud bow. “Thank you, it took a lot of effort, but I made it! And so did you! I saw your latest single competing with Sapphire Shores on the top of the charts!”

“What can I say?” the rocker said with a look of pride. “We both worked hard. Speaking of which, I take it you made your dress yourself?”

The fashionista gave a dramatic pose. “Oh of course, darling. I make all my own dresses. Yours looks marvelous as well.”

Melody flaunted her outfit. "Like it? Cost a lot but it's worth it. Still, with that line you made for Sapphire Shores, I might have to stop by sometime. Can't have her looking better than me when we're on the same ticket next month for a big show."

Rarity nodded as the two wandered off to talk. "Oh yes, I believe Dazzle is hosting a PFM anniversary showcase on the radio isn't she?"

The rocker nodded with a look of pride. "That's the show! Hard to believe Dazzle's still hosting, I hope I look half as good as her when I'm that old!"

The fashionista gave a nod as they stopped by one of the windows. "Oh yes, a few wrinkles but she still looks exactly like she did when we were teens...think you could maybe put a word in for me with her? I know she loves looking fabulous herself."

[hr]

Big Macintosh looked to Melody's husband as she and Rarity headed off for girl talk. “Ace?”

Ace blinked. “Big Macintosh?” he asked, looking up at the huge stallion, who was a good head taller than him, and he wasn't exactly small. “...Wow, you had a growth spurt.”

“Eeyup,” the big stallion replied simply.

There was an awkward pause.

“...And got quieter, you used to be a motor mouth...”

“Eeyup...and yah didn't just start talkin' about yerself because Ah wasn't sayin' nothin',” Big Macintosh replied, seeming pleasantly surprised.

Ace gave a chuckle. “What can I say? Melody's a good influence on me.”

“Glad tah hear it...Surprised tah see you two together,” the elder Apple sibling replied.

“Yeah, she likes to say I was a 'fixer uper'...”

“Eeyup...” Big Macintosh replied bluntly. “...Saw the Equus Cup with mah cousin. Nice goal.”

The athlete gave a proud smirk, showing the championship ring on his hoof. “Thanks. What can I say? I'm just that good.”

Cheerilee rolled her eyes good-naturedly. They reminded her of her twin sister Cherry talking about sports. “Boys...” she muttered, then gasped when she saw a pink Earth Pony with a yellow mane and tail. Her Cutie Mark was a yellow star with a trail of blue stars. “Starlight!” she called, waving and trotting over.

The mare gave a smile and waved in return. “Cheerilee!” she called, the two sharing a hug. “Good to see you again!”

The elementary school teacher nodded. “The same. How are things at Hoofington University?”

“Not bad, except for the occasional college prank. The seniors there could give Patch a run for her money,” the pink pony replied with a chuckle. “Hard to believe we both ended up being teachers.”

Cheerilee chuckled in reply. “Tell me about it. Though I think you have things harder than me. What with dealing with a bunch of crazy college students all the time..."

Starlight snickered. "Oh they're really not that bad. I don't know how you deal with a bunch of rambunctious little foals! I had enough trouble babysitting Melody's sisters!"

The two shared a laugh.

"I think Mrs. Hackney had it the hardest," Cheerilee replied, getting them both a cup of punch from a nearby bowl. “She had to deal with teenagers!”

The two shuddered, then laughed. "Yeah! Remember when the boys made so much noise she accidentally wrote two plus two equaling three?!" Starlight asked, laughing harder at the memory.

"Oh yes!...Speaking of Mrs. Hackney, will she be here tonight?”

Starlight shrugged, looking a bit sad at that thought. “I don't know. Last I checked she's enjoying retirement with Mr. Kadoo. They go ballooning all the time.”

“She deserves it, she was a great teacher,” Cheerilee replied, giving a nostalgic smile...though also a hint of jealousy at the news an old mare had found a husband in her old age.

“Yeah, the best...hey, will Cherry Blossom be here?” asked Starlight, sipping her punch.

The purple pony shook her head. “No, she's got a match tonight.”

“Oh...Remember when Patch convinced you two to pretend to be each other the entire class?”

Cheerilee's next sip of punch nearly came out her nose. “Oh yes! And we didn't tell any of you until the day way over!”

Starlight nodded. “And Bright Eyes was convinced you were still pretending!...Speaking of which, did you two ever make up?”

The purple teacher nodded with a smile. “Yes, thanks to Rarity...Oh! On that subject, did you hear about her new friend...”

Starlight rolled her eyes. “Yes...Look, I'm sure she's a nice girl, but ponies mixing us up due to our names is starting to get old!”

[hr]

Applejack occupied herself by simply wandering around the room, saying hello to ponies she recognized and sometimes making chit-chat. There was a lot of catching up to do and not much time to do it.

“There you are, Applejack!”

Applejack turned to find herself looking at a light blue Earth Pony with an orange mane dressed, her Cutie Mark a pink notebook with a pin. Next to her was a blue Earth Pony stallion with a dark orange mane, his Cutie Mark a Fleur-de-lis (Applejack only knew what it was because it was the stallion's cousin's name). Like Applejack, neither seemed to have dressed up that well. “Howdy, Bright Eyes, Lance. Good tah see yah,” she replied with a wave.

Bright Eyes, the mare, nodded and returned the wave. “It really is. I hope Sweet Apple Acres is doing well.”

“It's doin' fine, thanks. Hope your...uh...what's it called?” Applejack asked, scratching her head. “Society fer Rare Creatures ? Sorry, been awhile since Ah've heard the name.”

“The Equestrian Society for the Preservation of Rare Creatures,” the light blue mare recited. “And it's not my society, I'm just the current president.”

“Well either way, Fluttershy wanted meh tah thank yah fer lettin' her see the Breezies if Ah saw yah,” the farmer replied with a tip of her hat.

“Tell her she's welcome. She's one of the most dedicated animal care experts I've ever met,” Bright Eyes replied.

Many ponies thought it was strange Applejack and Bright Eyes got along, given Bright Eyes was the smartypants type, but both knew the importance of keeping the environment running right. An apple farm like AJ's took a lot of planning, but if the soil got ruined or the environment messed up, then the whole thing would fall apart. Especially when it came to the Zap Apples, which were wild by nature and couldn't be 'tamed.'

“Also, thank you for setting aside that portion of your land for the Vampire Fruit Bats and letting us research them. Fluttershy informed me that it wasn't easy,” Bright Eyes replied.

“Well, Ah still don't like the critters, but what can yah do? That and the tax cuts and grants are helpin' the farm,” Applejack replied with a shrug.

“Speaking of which, the next grant check is in the mail. It's the least we could do, we've learned a great deal about them thanks to you,” the environmentalist replied with a polite nod. “We've even developed lures that can draw them away from farm land and into a more natural habitat, which is a benefit to both the bats and the farmers considering those conflicts are why they're endangered to begin with.”

“Now that Ah'm happy tah hear!” Applejack said with a big smile. “Mah family have been scared of those things fer a long time, anythin' tah keep our crops safe is welcome.”

Lancer (or Lance to his friends) gave a nod. “The Zebrafricans are also excited about it, as they have a similar species to worry about,” he explained.

“Really? Huh. Yah know, Ah've never been tah but got a friend who came from there named Zecora,” Applejack replied. “So glad somethin' Ah did helps there even if Ah ain't gonna see it...of course yer gonna Ah bet, what with bein' an explorer and all.”

The blue stallion nodded. “Yes, I have been there multiple times and it's an amazing place to explore...of course you've been to a lot of exciting places as well if I'm not mistaken. I recall Miss Yearling telling me of meeting she had with you.”

Applejack blinked. “Yah know her?”

“We've...collaborated a few times,” Lancer replied with a knowing smile.

“...Oh, Ah get it! Hehe...And yeah, we've been on some crazy adventures,” the farmer replied, then gave a chuckle. “Remember when the biggest adventure we had was when Starlight got tah sub and took us all into those old caves near Everfree?”

Bright Eyes and Lancer chuckled. “Oh yes, I remember. We've come a long way sense then,” Lancer replied.

“You weren't there, but there was also the time we went to the Old Woods on the edge of Everfree Forest and found the Green Wing Songbird,” Bright Eyes explained. “That was a big moment for us...”

“Oh yeah, Ah remember the big ceremony yah got at the town hall,” Applejack replied.

“And I remember the ceremony in Canterlot when you defeated Discord...hehe, it's kinda ironic huh? We got all the action when we were teens and you get most of it now.”

The farmer nodded. “Ah'll say...hehe, did Ah ever tell yah about how Twili' got herself in a mess like Clover did that one time?”

[hr]

Rarity bite of a cookie. "You know, being a heroine who's recognized for saving the world multiple times is nice, but I miss when we were in High School, Melody. Back then the craziest thing to ever happen was that time the town got flooded due to trash in the river..."

Melody chuckled. "Yeah, can feel that. Just because I wasn't there doesn't mean Nightmare Moon, Discord, and the rest of them didn't effect me...still remember Tirek...ugh...I still can't believe you were the one who ended up getting wrapped up in crazy stuff. Patch was the one who always attracted the weird stuff."

The fashionista nodded. "Yes...in retrospect glowing pegasi and an unidentified, glowing alicorn aren't as odd as half the things I've gone through..."

The rocker nodded and looked at the time on a clock. “Hey, Rarity, sorry to cut this short, but the Rockin' Beats are the entertainment, so I gotta go get set up. Talk after?”

Rarity nodded with a smile. “Certainly darling,” she replied, giving a wave as Melody left to prepare for the dance portion of the reunion.

“Ah! Look out!”

The fashionista turned to see a light purple Earth Pony with a light pink mane and tail, her Cutie Mark a four-leaf clover, trip and nearly drop the snacks and drinks she'd picked up everywhere. The mare soon found herself floating in Rarity's telekinesis along with her items. “Clover, darling! Nice to see you!” she said, setting her down and floating her items back to her, careful not to mess up the simple, but beautiful, green dress she was wearing. “...Coordinated as ever, I see.”

Clover blushed. “Thanks, and yes, sorry, I didn't mean too...Somehow I can dance my way through an entire ballet and still trip over myself getting something to eat...”

“Clover, are you okay?!” called a blue Earth Pony stallion with a yellow mane wearing a suit, his Cutie Mark a pull cart. He galloped over...and tripped on some spilled punch, sliding straight at her.

Rarity once again saved the day with her telekinesis. “Hello, Dandy. Nice to see you too.”

“You too, Rarity...” muttered the stallion with a blush as he was set down next to his wife.

“It honestly is,” the fashionista replied with sincerity in her tone. “Though I didn't see you when I came in, darlings.”

Clover blushed once more. “Sorry, I couldn't decide what to wear. You know how...indecisive I can be sometimes...”

Rarity gave a sympathetic nod. “I know, I still remember the trouble I had making you a dress for that one show. And congratulations on making it to the big time! I was always particularly fond of your dream! Being in grand ballets with your name up in lights! Oh it's all so breathtaking!” the fashionista explained, saying her words like the idea of it was the most romantic thing in the world.

The purple Earth Pony blushed. “Thank you...but it's not all fun and games, it's a lot of hard work.”

“Oh I know, darling. I've got a Princess for a best friend and I still dream about becoming one after seeing how hard the job is,” Rarity replied. “I'm just being romantic.”

Clover couldn't help but chuckle. “I think I understand, I was the same way when I wanted to follow in my sister's hoofsteps...Oh! And Rarity! That reminds me! My stage director needs costumes for our next show! Since we were having this reunion, I thought I would ask you.”

Rarity put a hoof to her chin in thought. “Well, it's not my forte, darling, though I am capable of it...but the manager of my Manehattan branch specializes in clothing exactly this kind of situation!”

[hr]

Applejack had finished her conversation with Bright Eyes and continued on to her search for old friends at the reunion. There were definitely plenty.

“There you are, Bon Bon!” said Lyra nearby.

The yellow furred, purple maned Earth Pony with a candy cutie mark turned to her with a sigh. “Wrong Bon Bon, Lyra.”

“Darn it! That's the third time tonight!” the unicorn grumbled and wandered off.

Applejack smirked and trotted over. Taking a look at the mare, she noted she had a very shapely figure, like one would expect from a model, and wearing a gorgeous blue dress that accentuated it well. The fact she seemed to be eying the food greedily spoke a lot about how difficult it was to maintain it. “Howdy there, Bon Bon.”

The mare turned and looked to her with a smile. “Oh! Hello, Applejack!”

The farmer tilted her hat, and then gave a smirk. “Ah almost didn't recognize yah! Hard tah believe the gal who was eatin' any food she had on hoof could shape up like yah have!”

Bon Bon blushed a little bit. “Thanks, and trust me, it's not easy...” she said, then cringed as both heard munching on the other side of the refreshment table. The two looked over to see a chocolate brown Earth Pony stallion with a darker shade of brown for his mane and tail, Cutie Mark a top, munching some deserts. He was also notably pudgy. “Especially when somepony forgets I have to stay on a diet to keep my figure. Spinner...”

The stallion gave a nervous chuckle and put down the food. “Sorry dear...”

“It's fine...” Bon Bon replied, giving a sigh and nuzzling her husband. She looked back to Applejack and gave her a look over. “Speaking of figure, how do you keep yours so easy? You ate as much as I did!”

“Well, Ah'm also a farmer,” Applejack replied with some degree of pride. “Burn off most of it before sundown. But Ah'll tell yah, if Ah had tah choose between that and havin' tah have the willpower tah not gobble up everythin' all the time, Ah'll choose farmin'.”

“Thanks. It really is a hoofful, especially when posing for Photo Finish,” the fashion model replied. “That mare is very demanding...I'm honestly surprised you're so understanding, Applejack. You never really got the 'girly stuff' back at high school.”

The farmer chuckled. “Short answer? Rarity. And this one time Ah got mah life and hers switched and found out just how stressful that 'girly stuff' is.”

“...Your life is weird, AJ.”

“Ah know. By this point an evil overlord showin' up is basically Tuesday...Plus, sugarcube,” Applejack said, putting a hoof on her should. “Don't think Ah don't remember the Masquerade and how yah ran away and nearly fell off a cliff thinkin' we'd laugh at that dream of yers. Ah know how important this was tah yah.”

Bon Bon gave a small, grateful smile. “...Thanks, Applejack.”

[hr]

Cheerilee and Starlight stood next to the refreshment table, looking out at the gym, seeing so many of their old friends having paired off.

“...So...you never found a special somepony either?” Cheerilee asked with a lonely sigh.

Starlight pinned her ears. “No...Things with Ace obviously didn't work out like I planned...We weren't the perfect pair...Never found Mr. Right after that, you know?”

The elementary school teacher gave an understanding, but clearly not happy, nod. “Oh I do...And then there's Cherry Blossom who has so many admirers it's a wonder she's not married...Guess they want an amazon and not a bookworm...”

“Then how did Bright Eyes get Lancer?” Starlight asked, putting a hoof on her shoulder. “I'm sure you'll find somepony someday...”

While Cheerilee was looking at Starlight, a peach colored hoof reached out from under the table and swapped out some of her food.

The college teacher then gave a sly smile. “And you know...I think Big Macintosh is still single...”

Cheerile blushed heavily. “Big Mac?! Oh yes, he is...he definitely is...why do you bring that up now?!”

“Because I've seen you look his way like twenty times since we've been here,” Starlight replied with a chuckle. “You're sweet on him.”

“...Well...I...what about you and Slipknot?” Cheerilee retorted.

Starlight spat out the punch she'd just taken a sip of and coughed. She looked over at a blue stallion with a lilac colored mane, his Cutie Mark a rope tied into Forget-Me-Knot. “S-Slipknot? I...well...” she said, a blush forming on her face.

The school teacher smirked. “I've seen you look his way forty times, Starlight...” she replied, then took a piece of cheese from her plate and took a bite...then spat it out, causing it to bounce off like it was made of rubber. “What the hay?!”

The two heard laughter and looked down, finding a peach furred mare with a light pink mane and tail to crawl out from under the table, her Cutie Mark a pink and yellow patch of fabric.

“Patch!” both of them complained with rolling eyes.

“Oh come on, I gotcha good!” the mare replied, and put Cheerilee's food back on her plate.

Cheerilee allowed herself to chuckle a little. “I suppose you did...still the prankster as always, I see.”

The joker nodded with a grin. “Not just any prankster, I'm a professional circus clown! I get to do this as a job now!”

“Class clown to circus clown,” Starlight replied with a good-natured smile. “Is anypony surprised?”

“It'd be more surprising if she was anything else,” Cheerilee replied. “Though thank you for giving us notes on that counterprank to Rainbow Dash when she went a little overboard.”

Patch laughed. “Oh no problem! I know better than anypony how sometimes it takes a prank to beat a prank! I just wish I was in town! That would've been the biggest prank I ever pulled!”

“What about your graduation prank where you somehow snuck into the school after dark and replaced all the chalk with rubber?” Starlight asked, giving a chuckle.

Cheerilee covered her mouth, trying not to laugh. “Mrs. Hackney went through so many pieces before she figured it out...”

Patch almost fell on her back laughing. “Oh, I remember! The look on her face!”

“You're lucky she understood it was one last prank for graduation,” Starlight remarked. “Would've stunk to get thrown in detention on the last day.”

“Yeah...Hehe, those were the days...” the professional clown replied, thinking back.

“...So...Did you end up with a special somepony?” Cheerilee asked after a pause, almost hoping not. Patch had always had trouble with commitment.

The prank loving mare nodded. “Yeah! Buddy! He's over there!” she said, pointing over to a white furred stallion with a mint blue mane and tail, his cutie mark a Rugby ball. He was currently telling jokes and laughing it up with a few stallions. “Great guy, real good sense of humor! Hehe...our wedding was a 'prank' wedding! But what would you expect when half the guests are clowns?!”

“Of course...I'm...happy for you...” Cheerilee replied with a forced smile.

[hr]

Applejack and Bon Bon had ultimately walked apart. Mainly because Lyra had mistaken Bon Bon for 'her' Bon Bon again, so Bon Bon had headed off with her to find her to put an end to that. Rarity and Cheerilee may have been content to talk one pony's ear off the whole night, but Applejack preferred getting to meet with lots of her old friends chatting it up.

Which was how she ended up noticing one white furred, pink maned mare sitting off to herself, rather timidly and dressed in the humblest white dress one could imagine. Her Cutie Mark was a pink heart with a few yellow ones around it.

“Sweetheart, that you?” Applejack asked, trotting over.

The mare jumped, then gave a smile as she noticed who was calling. “Oh! Hello, Applejack. It's been awhile...”

The orange mare gave her a smile. Sweetheart wasn't Fluttershy shy, but she had a timidness to her. “Got that right. Haven't seen you since yah and Teddy moved tah Manehattan! Though Ah guess the name's Dr. Sweetheart now, huh?”

The timid mare blushed. “Um...just Sweetheart is fine. But thank you for noticing...”

Applejack nodded. “Yer cousin Redheart told meh about it, she was so proud of yah for it.”

“She is?”

“Yeah, she was prouder than a peacock!” the farmer replied, patting her on the back. “Congrats, sugarcube, yah earned it.”

“T-Thank you, I worked really hard...” Sweetheart replied, still blushing. “How about you, Applejack? How have you been?”

“Can't complain. Sweet Apple Acres is still up and runnin' and Apple Bloom got her Cutie Mark!” Applejack replied with a look pride.

Sweetheart gasped with a smile. “That's great! What's her special talent?”

“Helpin' other ponies find and learn 'bout theirs!” she replied, producing a picture of Apple Bloom with her Cutie Mark and showing it to her. “And here's the crazy thin'! She and her friends all got 'em at the same time!”

“That's amazing, I didn't know that could happen! Oh Applejack, you must be so proud!”

“Yah know Ah am!” Applejack replied, giving a smile...and then noticed something about Sweetheart she hadn't before now that she wasn't in the corner. “Sweetheart...Uh, no offense, but do yah have a baby on the way?”

Sweetheart gave a small chuckle, showing the physical signs of just that, though not very far into it. “Yes, mine and Teddy's first.”

“Aw shucks! And here Ah am talkin' about mah family, that's great news!” Applejack said, sharing a hug with her old friend...then blinking and looking around. “Speakin' of Teddy, where is he?”

“Oh, he said he had to go check something, he'll be back soon...”

“Ah hope so! Ah wanna congratulate 'em!”

[hr]

A blue furred stallion with an orange mane, his Cutie Mark a black comb, walked through the hall ways to find somewhere private. He was currently wearing a suit, and seemed to not be enjoying it, constantly fidgeting with it. He looked, looking around to see if anypony was around...and then pulled out an old teddy bear that looked like it'd been torn in half at one point and stitched back together. He gave a smile...then looked up and found himself looking at Big Mactinosh...who was currently holding a certain small, stuffed donkey.

“...”

“So...yah really did have a teddy bear, Teddy?” Big Macintosh asked.

“Yeah...And you got a stuffed animal too?” Teddy asked back.

“Eeyup...Her name's Miss Smartypants...didn't name her...”

“...No pony must ever know...”

“Eeyup...So...uh...you're a hair stylist now?” Big Macintosh asked, not even trying to hide his attempt to change the subject.

“Yeah,” Teddy replied, then gave a growl. “Don't make fun of me for it! I can't help what I'm good at!”

“Wasn't gonna. Mah little cousin Babs Seed looks up tah yah somethin' fierce,” the older farmer replied. He admitted, he respected Teddy for not seeming one bit intimidated by the larger stallion. Mainly because he knew the blue stallion had reason not to be.

The former 'bad boy' blinked. “Babs? She's your cousin? I didn't know that.”

“Eeyup, and she's going to grow up to be a hair stylist too, it's her special talent,” Big Macintosh replied.

“Oh...well, kinda feels good to have somepony look up to me...” Teddy replied, rubbing his head. “...Though to be honest, sometimes I think ponies think I've gone soft...hehe, sometimes I head over to this local indy boxing place and give it a shot,” he replied, doing some quick boxing maneuvers. “Just to prove I'm still tough!”

“Well, yah were always the school tough guy,” Big Mac replied. “Can't say Ah ain't happy yah lost your attitude though.”

“You can thank Sweetheart for that one...” Teddy replied with a chuckle. “She really was a good influence on me...Oh! By the way, we're gonna have a kid!”

The farmer gave a smirk. “Congratulations.”

Before the conversation could continue, the two jumped at a camera flash. They looked over to see Featherweight standing nearby with his camera before taking off.

“...School paper taking pictures to report on the reunion?”

“Eeyup...”

“...And he just got a picture of us with our stuffed animals?”

“Eeyup...”

“...CATCH HIM! QUICK!”

[hr]

“Attention everypony, the Rockin' Beats will soon be performing, please take your places on the dance floor,” announced the reunion organizer.

The ponies assembled on the dance floor, Starlight and Cheerilee still standing next to each other as their friends with husbands paired off. The two left out as always.

“...” Starlight looked over at Slipknot, who likewise seemed to not have a partner. She looked to Patch who motioned her on. “...Hey, Cheerilee...I'll go ask Slipknot to dance if you ask Big Macintosh to, deal?”

Cheerilee's eyes went wide and her face grew bright red. “Well...I...I...”

“...I'm tired of being alone, aren't you?...We've been staring at them all night, maybe we should just ask them...plus, Patch won't let either of us live it down if we don't. And you know how she can be...”

“...” Cheerilee gave a sigh. “Of course I'm tired of it...fine...where IS Big Macintosh?”

“Alright, so you destroy that picture and Ah get yah an exclusive interview with Granny Smith, deal?” the elder Apple sibling asked Featherweight as they re-entered the gym. The silent colt nodded. “Good...”

Teddy wiped some sweat off his brow as the colt disappeared in what seemed like a blink and without a sound. “That was close...”

“Eeyup...” Big Macintosh replied with a sigh of relief.

“Big Mac?”

The stallion looked over to see Cheerilee standing beside him. “Oh, howdy Miss Cheerilee.”

“Hello...Big Macintosh...” the school teacher said, holding out a shaking hoof. “...May I have this dance?”

Big Macintosh's face grew a little redder than normal, so did Cheerilee's. “Yah...Yah want tah?”

Cheerilee nodded. “Yes, I do...To give it a chance, if nothing else...”

“O-Okay...” the normally stoic and in control stallion replied, taking her hoof. “If it's what yah want.”

Teddy chuckled as the two headed onto the dance floor. “...Sappy...” he muttered...then found his wife offering him her hoof. “Oh! Sweetheart!...Are you sure? I mean with the baby and all...”

“I'm the doctor, Teddy. Dancing is good exercise while you're pregnant...besides, I know you'll be careful with me,” Sweetheart replied, giving him a kiss on the cheek.

The 'tough stallion' blushed bright red. “Aw shucks...”

Starlight slowly approached Slipknot. “Slipknot?”

“Oh, hello Starlight, long time no see!” the stallion replied. “How are you doing?”

“I'm fine...Um...Slipknot...look...” Starlight stuttered, blushing. “...If...if it's alright with you, maybe....would you dance with me?” she asked, remembering how her attempts to get Ace with her had blown up in her face, fear welling up.

Slipknot took her hoof politely. “I'd be honored, Starlight.”

The stage set up in the gym was lit up with spotlights and Melody stood front and center with her band, the Rockin' Beats. “Hello everypony! I hope you're ready to dance because the Rockin' Beats are ready to rock!”

The gathered graduates of Ponyville High cheered.

=Sweet Music – My Little Pony Tales=

“Sweet music! Oh sweet music!

That's what I hear when you appear!

Sweet music! Oh sweet music!

Life is in tune when you are near!” Melody sung, effortlessly keeping tune even as she danced on stage. She noticed Ace dancing to the rhythm and offered her hoof. He accepted it and she pulled him up, not missing a beat as she transitioned into dancing with her husband.

Applejack, Patch, and Buddy all danced their own way together. Even if the latter two were married, neither was what one would call conventional by any stretch. As a result, the sight was three ponies doing something more akin to break dancing mixed with a hoedown than anything normal, which was fine with the three funloving ponies.

Clover politely invited Rarity to dance with her and Dandy so she didn't feel left out...and because having somepony who wasn't so clumsy there to catch them was a welcome thing.

Teddy slowly and carefully danced with Sweetheart, being surprisingly gentle with his pregnant wife. To any who remembered what he used to be like, how much he'd changed was plain to see.

Bon Bon danced with Spinner, but the two also shared their spot of the dance floor with the Ponyville Bon Bon and Lyra. Seeing the two side by side, it became apparent that somehow the two Bon Bons had ended up with the exact same dress. Combined with their coloration and similar Cutie Marks, one could understand how Lyra had repeatedly got the two of them mixed up.

Bright Eyes and Lancer simply danced in a more conventional manner, the two being conventional and logical ponies for the most part.

“When you are gone,

The song just isn't there!

But then I see your face again,

And music fills the air!

Fills the air!” Melody continued to sing, still dancing on stage with Ace. Melody was a pro at this, and Ace was one of the most athletic ponies in the room, so to no ponies surprise they were the best dancers in the room.

Big Mac and Cheerilee slowly danced a waltz, allowing themselves to enjoy the moment. Starlight and Slipknot were dancing a different style, more fitting for the rock style, but let their guard down and let themselves be lost in the beat.

“Sweet music! Oh sweet music!

I love the sound when you're around!

Sweet music! Oh sweet music!

Beautiful harmonies abound!

I know our song will never die!

Never die!

We make sweet music you and I!

You and I!” Melody finished, allowing Ace to throw her into the air and catch her, all without messing up one line. She gave him a kiss, which he gladly returned.

“...That was fun...” Big Macintosh admitted, blushing slightly as his dance with Cheerilee ended. “Yer a good dancer, Miss Cheerilee...”

The teacher blushed in return. “Thank you, Big Mac...so are you...”

“...Well...how did I do?” Starlight asked, looking a bit uncertain.

“You did perfect, Starlight...want to dance again?” Slipknot asked in return.

[hr]

“...and yah shoulda seen the look on old Tirek's face when his beam didn't do a thin'! He couldn't believe what was happenin'!” Applejack said, walking next to Patch. The combined group was now walking through the Crystal Castle after the reunion had concluded.

“Hehe! I bet! Man, you girls have all the luck with these big adventures! I wish I'd gotten to be part of it!” Patch replied, smiling wide. “...Well, you know, as a Bearer. I actually missed that one, I was visiting Rosey on the Isle of Pony at the time.”

“Eh, isn't all sunshine and rainbows...” said the farmer. “Trust meh, sometimes Ah'd like tah trade yah...though speakin' of adventures, did yah ever...yah know...find...her?”

“...Bright Glow?...Nah...But I have heard of some sightings of a UFO that looks just like her and the others! So there's always hope, right?!”

“Sugarcube, Ah can turn into a glowin' magical pony, stranger things have definitely happened.”

“Of course I'll make you a dress, Bon Bon,” Rarity replied with a look of pride. “It would be an honor. Not just to make one for a model such as yourself, but for an old friend.”

Bon Bon gave a blush. “Thanks Rarity, it'd be nice.”

Cheerilee looked up at Big Macintosh. “I had a good night...Did you?”

“Eeyup...” the older Apple sibling replied with a small smile.

“Thanks for inviting us over to talk and catch up,” said Starlight, trotting along next to Slipknot.

“And give us a chance to meet a PRINCESS!” Melody added, giving a small squee.

“Oh, it's not problem, darling,” Rarity replied. “Twilight has plenty of room,” she explained, as they passed bathroom number 37. “And we had to pick up our little sisters anyway.”

“Oh, I can't wait to see them, I haven't seen any of them since they were babies,” Sweetheart said with a rather cute smile.

“Let's just hope those three haven't driven Twilight nuts,” Applejack commented.

“Oh come now, Applejack, what's the worst that could happen?” Rarity asked, opening the door...and the group finding themselves looking at two sets of CMC sleeping with the three Sirens, looking surprisingly peaceful and happy despite the fact the latter three were gigantic, formally world threatening fish monsters.

Twilight blinked, looking over. “...Uh, hi girls!...I can explain...”

“...Again, your lives are weird,” Bon Bon commented, eyes wide.

“...Not gonna argue with that, sugarcube...by this point this is pretty much normal for us...”

The End

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rantsaboutponies · 6 years ago

Text

Season 8 Retrospective

This... Okay, Season 8’s final W-L-T score was 0-11-15, which means that, quantitatively, it should have been the worst season yet. But...I dunno, this season just kind of...came and went. It might partially have to do with the fact that this is the eighth season of a show that should have ended with Season 3, but I think there’s a bigger factor at play here. Yes, it’s that most baffling of poor decisions, the School of Friendship!

I still cannot figure out why they thought this was such a good idea to build the entire season around. Maybe the voice actors for the Mane 6 are trying to move on from the show and are minimizing their future commitments? If it’s just trying to sell toys of the New Mane 6, they wouldn’t need to focus on them so heavily (people will buy figurines of background characters, for god’s sake), but phasing out the original Mane 6′s toyline also seems like a dumb idea. I think it’s just that corporations still haven’t gotten over the collective concept that they all seemed to have in the 1980s that kids love school and will watch anything set at a school. You know which cartoons I watched the least (or just flat out never watched) as a kid? Recess! Teacher’s Pet! Braceface! You know, the ones that spent a large chunk of time at school! School is by far the least interesting part of any child’s life! If the characters were school-age, you maybe showed a scene or two an episode just to establish that, but that’s it! A good example is Kim Possible; sure, she went to school every episode, but the majority of each episode was all the spy shit. Because no duh! (For the record, as a kid, I was also incredibly bored by any show that was just about kids doing normal shit all the time, school-related or otherwise: Doug, Rocket Power, The Weekenders, Hey Arnold!, Pepper Ann, As Told by Ginger, every single live-action laugh-track Disney sitcom...come to think of it, is that all that late-’90s to early-2000s Disney Channel and Nickelodeon shows were? Jesus Christ, I miss when Cartoon Network was fun.)

Anyway, I don’t know what kids watch these days. Maybe they don’t even watch this show; I have no idea. I haven’t kept up. Why am I even still talking about this? On with the list!

#1. “Road to Friendship”: Like I said, this one was the closest to “good” we got this season. Starlight and Trixie tend to have good dialogue together, and this was no exception. Did anyone notice that Starlight was barely in this season at all, though? They really need to deal with their constant problem of adding characters to the main cast and then not knowing what to do with them in future episodes.

#2. “Sounds of Silence”: If not for Autumn Blaze being so goddamn annoying (and the moral being fairly lame), this episode might have been better. At least I now know why I’ve been seeing kirin fanart for a few months now.

#3. “What Lies Beneath”: This was probably the only halfway decent episode involving the New Mane 6 because it actually gave us a bit of insight into their characters besides “like the Mane 6, but children”. The Tree of Harmony’s way of thinking is still super fucked-up, though.

#4. “Molt Down”: Puberty episode? Sure, why not. Still better than Big Mouth.

#5. “Father Knows Beast”: This one goes right next to the other Spike one because, like all Spike episodes, it really left little to no impact. The fact that Spike is still being written to be dumb enough to fall for some random dragon showing up and saying that he’s his father is pretty grating, though.

#6. “The Break Up Break Down”: Miscommunication storylines annoy the shit out of me, especially since Modern Family became 90% “I heard a thing and I’m going to assume the worst instead of just confirming it with the person I heard it from” episodes. At least Discord finally got a couple funny lines again.

#7. “Non-Compete Clause”: I don’t know why Applejack and Rainbow Dash thought a rehash of “Fall Weather Friends” would be a good idea if they mixed in a bit of child endangerment. Thank god the kids turned out to be smarter than them.

#8. “A Rockhoof and a Hard Place”: Still hard to believe they couldn’t find Rockhoof any digging or demolition jobs anywhere in Equestria. I do like that the ending basically acknowledged that they still don’t know exactly what the point of making Twilight a princess was or what she even does anymore.

#9 & #10. “School Daze”: I was technically right. Neighsay did return to be a villain in the season finale; he just wasn’t the real villain. The fact that they could have arrived at the solution at any time and just chose not to was really annoying. Remember, kids love storylines about legal loopholes and technicalities!

#11 & #12. “School Raze”: Yet another episode that required everyone involved to be as stupid as possible to get the plot going. Nothing like going with your first assumptions and ignoring all evidence to the contrary, eh, Twilight?

#13: “Marks for Effort”: This was just dumb. Twilight wouldn’t let the CMC into the school because they already knew enough about friendship? Yeah, sure. If anything, the episode proved just the opposite. Cozy Glow intentionally failed the test because she thought it would get them in? Uh-huh. Given her secret ultimate evil goal was to make everyone friends with her, I can only assume that she did in fact think that that plan would work, since getting them kicked out definitely wouldn’t endear her to them.

#14. “The End in Friend”: I don’t think this episode accomplished what it was attempting to. No, Rarity and Rainbow Dash don’t have anything in common. No, they don’t have to hang out together if they don’t have any activities they both enjoy. No, that doesn’t make them enemies, nor does it mean they can’t still hang out with their other friends. Sheesh.

#15. “The Washouts”: More child endangerment! Why a dangerous stunt team was able to hire Scootaloo I still don’t know, but apparently no one in the audience had a problem with that. If the lesson was to teach children not to be so fickle about picking their role models, that’s probably a good idea.

I’m not sure there’s all that much difference between these two parts of the list, but whatever.

#16. “Fake It ‘Til You Make It”: Seriously, though, Fluttershy’s only mistake was not telling those raccoons ahead of time that she was going to be using different personae. It was working!

#17. “Grannies Gone Wild”: This episode beat out Book Club by a whole month for its message of, “Old people are people too!” The Wonderbolts are assholes, Applejack is an asshole, and everypony loses! Hooray!

#18. “The Mean 6”: At least Chrysalis was still kind of intimidating in “To Where and Back Again”. This episode just made her look like a joke who had no clue what she was doing (more than “A Canterlot Wedding” already did, I mean).

#19. “The Parent Map”: Remember “Parental Glideance”? That was last year’s, “God, my parents are so embarrassing!” episode. This is this year’s. Joy.

#20. “Friendship University”: Someone was confused that I complained about Twilight apparently hating competition, even though she was trying to shut down the Friendship University because she clearly knew that Flim and Flam were untrustworthy. This person apparently missed the fact that Twilight was upset that somepony was opening a competing friendship school BEFORE she found out it was Flim and Flam who were running it, and she in fact went to the Friendship University specifically to find something wrong with it. That’s the part I was objecting to: the fact that Twilight is still so neurotic that she can’t handle not being in control of everything. In fact, that raises an interesting point. Has there ever been an episode where Twilight has had to learn the lesson of, “Other people are capable of things, too. Not everything has to be run by you first”? It certainly wasn’t this one.

#21. “Surf and/or Turf”: Hey, another episode where the conflict made no sense! And, as an added bonus, another one where just talking to the other people involved would have resolved it instantly! Huzzah! Old El Paso managed to make “Why not both?” the lesson of a 30-second commercial. I don’t know why this took so much longer.

#22. “Horse Play”: COM-MU-NI-CA-TION. “You’re a bad actress. You can have a surprise cameo at the end of our play to make the crowd happy, but that’s it.” Jesus.

#23. “The Hearth’s Warming Club”: What exactly was the message of this episode? “Don’t lie”? No, because they never told Twilight the truth; she just happened to be standing behind them when Gallus told the other kids. “Don’t wreck shit”? No, because Gallus never faced any consequences for that. Honestly, the lesson should have been directed at teachers, and it should have been, “Don’t try this shit. It never works; it just pisses everyone off, including you.”

#24. “The Maud Couple”: Worst new character of the season. Hands down. I hope we never see him again, especially if the only way we get more Maud is if he comes along for the ride. What a prick.

#25. “A Matter of Principals”: Speaking of episodes that teach the lesson to the wrong person... Remind me again why Discord wasn’t the one who learned the lesson here? Because he’s unteachable? Because he’s “reformed” and therefore has already learned all the lessons he needs to? Also, this is a rare episode where the characters do actually communicate properly (Starlight does tell Discord to knock his shit off), and they try to pretend they didn’t! Twilight gets mad at Starlight for not talking to Discord, even though she did! You can’t do this, writers! You just can’t!

#26. “Yakity-Sax”: Talk about not knowing what fucking lesson they were trying to teach. You know what? I bet this actually happened. I bet Michael P. and/or Wil Fox were practicing their electric guitar or drums or bagpipes or whatever for days on end at all hours of the night, and all their neighbors called the cops on them. This was their way of sticking it to everyone. “No! You should let me do whatever the hell I want! It doesn’t matter if it disturbs you! Fuck the system! It’s my passion! You can’t stop me from living my dream!”

There’s a holiday special next week, and near as I can figure, it hasn’t been aired in another country ahead of time! We’ll actually get to watch this one together! Yay!

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